Wednesday, February 23, 2011

What Happens When You Stop Drinking?

First, you get really, startlingly, tired.  You should find some alternate food source, and even, I dare say, cut out caffeine at the same time you cut out alcohol.  Not that I'm a model of this behavior at the moment.  And you'll get very grouchy. 

Second, you'll probably feel like shit about yourself and the world around you.   Over time, this feeling will dissipate to be replaced by the notion that, blandly, the world doesn't really care about your drinking habits.  Whereas before "everything" mattered when you were drinking, and everyone cared, and drama abounded, not drinking can be boring at first, because we drinkers were so oriented toward drinking when there's nothing else to do, or drinking when there's everything else to do, etc.

Third, you'll stop hanging out with at least three-quarters of your friends, and realize that you'll need to find alternative models of behavior if you want to continue not drinking.  As comfortable as you might say you are to friends who drink and go to bars (when you're invited), let's be honest and say it like this: going to bars isn't that much fun, and can bring out small (or large) anxiety attacks that persist long after the environment changes.

Fourth, you'll want to do something with your heretofore worthless life.

Fifth, you'll realize that doing something, whatever it is, is really, terribly, difficult.  And yet.  Having freedom from pressure can be very easy in moments of transition.

Sixth, you'll be forced to face some of your own hard seeded emotional irrationalities and either affirm or confront yourself before moving to fast-sinking plateau of utter insecurity about what you've previously believed about the world.  This is actually a good step.

Seventh, you'll write a blog post about this, and hope that you're convincing about the last part.  At least to the one person who matters....

269 comments:

1 – 200 of 269   Newer›   Newest»
Anonymous said...

He's right.
It's one hell of a rollercoaster ride people, hang in there!!!
7 months for me.
And remember it's like you are starting off again where you left off when you started drinking.
Everything will start to feel better in time and the high you got from drinking will come back in spirts from just enjoying life. No I'm not some god freak, but I am telling you the truth!
Do this for yourself! You are the only one who matters!

Anonymous said...

Ps. 31 years old drinking every day since I was 14.

Anonymous said...

Hi. I just turned 30, and have been drinking heverly for 10 yrs since b4 my dad died. I am 15 days sober, and already not looking back I feel much better, cycling 2 work not smoking during the day etc. And saving a small fortune. It's not easy tho, had trouble sleeping at first , and eating like a horse, sweets chocolate etc. Putting weight on. But feeling much fitter! I've tried lots of times b4 to give up, but wAsnt ready , but somethings different this time. I WANT TO DO IT FOR ME! rarther than being nagged by others, I think unless I'd ready to give up and change ur routine it won't happen! Good luck all!!!!

Anonymous said...

Drinking since 18 Years old 33 now ...about 25 to 30 beers a week sometimes more... Sick and tired of it

Anonymous said...

Im 24. I recently quit drinking and im going through hell. Im 17 days sober and instead of feeling better im feeling worse. So much anxiety that i've never had before and this morning when i woke up i was so dizzy i had to get sent home from work. I feel like my sleep is very important and totally effects my mood the next day. Did anyone else feel super shitty before getting any better ? My doc has me on a low dose of gabapentin to help with the anxiety. I'd rather not be on meds but if it means getting through the days im willing to try anything. I also feel like im slipping into depression. Im hoping time will heal these things. If not i may just go insane... I feel great about my choice and im looking forward to feeling like myself again. Any advice is welcome. cheers

Dustin said...

Yes you will feel better!! im 2 months now. after 1 month i felt great. 2 months, felt better then i ever have in my life. this is the longest i've ever been sober and the happiest i've ever been. the first month can be "iffy" but its just cause your re-learning how to live without alcohol. I quit drinking, smoking cigs and weed all at once. It was very tough and I dont recommend it. I was very sick and felt like shit anyway so it didn't really matter. Its a rollercoaster like the others have said. Just go for it. Prove to yourself you can do it and you will be very graciously rewarded. Im just about as crazy now as i was when i was drunk. being healthy has sooo many benefits.

Stevo said...

Its great that that we can blog about the difficulty of not drinking. I've been 17 days sober now and the difference is amazing. I am sharper, more alert and more focused. Though I am on abstinence group therapy programme, I must say sitting there and sharing the reasons why NOT to drink is so great. And upligting. The support groups are great, especially when you are feeling down. And I am keeping busy, busy, busy.... Loving this lifestyle! Hang in there! We can beat this!!

Anonymous said...

Im 23 years old, i been drinking for 5 years, i started young, i am now just 21 days sober, and i feel determined to stay sober. How long does the detox take, how soon do you start to lose weight. How long before you stop craving alchol.

hmm said...

http://offbooze.blogspot.com/2012/02/what-happens-when-you-stop-drinking-how.html

Here's what I think.

Anonymous said...

2 more days and i will complete 30 days of being sober, January 28th 2012 was the last day i had a drink, its been hard, i have headaches and back pain, and i do seem more irritated, but im happy other days and nights, i get good sleep, no hangovers, but it also seems im pushing away people, they ask me to go out and have a drink, i tell them no, so after a few times, they just stop asking me and i dont hear from them as much. It gets lonely, but i will manage some how. Being able to post a blog really helps, its like i can say anything and no one will judge me, i am thankfull

Anonymous said...

5 weeks sober now after 15 years of regular drinking - turned 34 in January 2012 - last 5 years in particular were particularly bad - 2 bottles of wine per night - god knows how I managed to hold down a job, with those endless horrendous hangovers. But I couldn't or rather I didn't want to stop myself.

I already feel much better, calmer and more in control. The main downside is that social life in the UK seems to revolve around alcohol so adjusting to that is a challenge. I'd recommend joining a gym if you haven't alredy, just to give you something to do! I literally need to get a life.

The first two weeks of sobriety were easily the hardest - I must have spent a full 10 minutes in front of the wine section in the supermarket one Saturday afternoon, having an internal argument with myself - "but you deserve it, you've got through the whole week sober" etc, but someone like me can never stop at a bottle let alone a glass and then you're back at square one, "needing" a drink to get over the anxiety of the hangover.

It's gotten easier every week since. I was sick of the anxiety you get with a hangover, that and the physical and mental lethargy. I'm naturally prone to depression and anxiety, and the great seduction of alcohol is that it provides short term relief from those feelings but the great con is that medium-to-long term it exacerbates those very issues.

I want to give myself a chance to experience life without the crutch of alcohol, and face up to whatever it is I've been surpressing for years in a drunken stupor.

Good luck everyone.

Anonymous said...

I quit drinking for six weeks at the beginning of the year. This was after many years of drinking without taking a day off. I was inspired by the book "The easy way to quit drinking" by Allen Carr. To my disappointment, after six weeks without drinking,I felt a little better physically and mentally, but not much. I am drinking again and wondering how I can improve my results when I quit again

Anonymous said...

I have stopped for 18 days. Have lost weight, feel better and the brain is sharper. My mates who drink heavily think its a fat joke. They don't invite me for drinks. Wtf ?? I'm not a freak. I still drink , but not alchohol. Its their loss. Ill hang out with the tea, coffee and milkshake crowd. At least I will remember what I say, be non aggressive, no hangovers and a slightly lighter wallet.....

Anonymous said...

Im only a week in, after 15 years of a bottle of wine a night. I am so tired all the time, I sleep like a log through the night, I feel bored and am stuffing my face with sugary food. But the anxiety is going away, and Im feeling a lot more positive. This past week is the first time I havent woken up in the night feeling sick and anxious. Its great to wake up without a hangover. I am truly taking it one day at a time though.. this blog is brilliant to read.

shriram said...

When you want to leave alcohol the first thing you do is you start eating your food i.e. dinner during your routine time of drinking. Since you have eaten your food you will not remember taking alcohol. don't make a routine to come home and open a drink actually you are hungry and one drink leads to another. see that you are not feeling hungry in the evenings, satisfy your hunger by eating something nutritious. TRY - its working with me - all the best - you need to love your self thats it.

Anonymous said...

Hi, I knew you were all out there somewhere. I have been a lush since I was 14. I am now 46. The only time I had long periods of time without alcohol was when I travelled to remote, alcohol free places. I have had numerous therapies etc., and have always, always self loathed. I manage to cut down and have had extremely successful careers - always controlling it so I don't have to give it up. But now, I have a child and I know that the bottle or so of red wine and the few roll ups in the garden, every night, are damaging me more than just physically. I cannot live with the guilt that it brings when I see my angel awake the next morning with her beautiful smile.... and as for the money! I am 10 days sober and smoke free. I am still finding it hard, I awake with a hang over still?? does anyone else get this? My sleep is better but disturbed. I am eating for England but not to worry, life will be better. I can't wait to feel brilliant. Tell me it will happen. Love to you all. Rita. x

Anonymous said...

Heavyer wallet

Anonymous said...

Rita I feel exactly the same as you I feel so guilty when I see my princess and feel like garbage I'm 2 weeks in and feel sick and have headaches . I quit for 6. Months and still felt slightly Ill back then . But my diet sucks so that's prob y

Dick Stone said...

WELL JUNE 15TH WILL BE 10 MONTHS I think I am now just just starting to come to some sort of reality of what life is about. Well I started drinking at 15 quit high school drank skipped didnt care life was about the party onto 30 same lot of debt several duis a son half assed education lot of student debt ged living with my grandma life the reality is drinking royally messed up shit now sober feel better ,alot of emotional garbag+e ,feeling worthless ,helpless which is good from the drinking view. Try to fight the fuck its cause it would be easy to say fuck it and restart the party of disaster. Bottom line one day at a time my sobriety is a gift from God so he has to have a plan so i sit and wait

Anonymous said...

Hi I am 30 years old I begun drinking at the age of 15 smoking also I didn't drink heavily until about
2 years ago after I had my fourth child I drink about two and a half 40 oz. Per night and here recently I wake up feeling depressed I don't want to drink or smoke cigarettes anymore I'm tired of it....so today I am going to Wal-Mart to purchase a treadmill today is the day I quit I will begin eating different and walking reading all of these other testimonies tell me I can quit too. thanks for sharing.

Anonymous said...

Bern drinking vodka for years. Slowly got out of hand until I stopped 14 days ago, also started a strict diet at the same time. My sleep is better but disturbed, I have headaches which I have found to get better if I drink more water. Still get the cravings but managing to keep them under control. Have lost 12lbs in two weeks! Determined to be in control of alcohol instead of the other way round. Good luck to you all x

Anonymous said...

I am 59 years old, been drinking regularly since 27, 6-10 shots of whiskey daily in the past 2 years, with a couple days here and there not drinking. The last hangover did me in. Been lucky with no accidents, DUI's or family loss, but it was getting close. Today is day 8 of no alcohol. No withdrawals to speak of aside from being very tired and aggitated, very lightheaded. Taking vitamins and eating a lot of sweets. My husband is an alcoholic and I am seeing him in a new light that is going to be a problem, for both of us. I am trusting in God that he will help me through decissions I will have to make. Pray for me.

Anonymous said...

I Suffer from anxiety and stress feel anxious and uptight, the drink relaxes me, i raned it in from 4 to 2 nights a week. Thing is it relaxes me after only 2-3 drinks i feel good like calm no aniety as others have siad. Thats what i think though but in reality i can become volitile argumentative and can get very agressive somtimes not always though, which i never liked.

My other half says you need to chill out but how ?. Medatation through breathing and relaxtion hypnosis CD's help. Might sound like crap but it can be something t do and you just sit/lie and listen with your eyes closed.

Like others im simply fed up of the drinking as its just totally unhealthy. First week off it since im 15 now 34. Feel So tired man. My excuse was there was nothing else to do, so i had to replace it with something and started swimmimng in local swimpool again, 21 lenghts ( not exactly olympics material ). 10 times cheaper than drinking and felt so much better afterward.

My fear is that i dont last and lack of self control sometimes is worrying, then the guilt of not not achieving a goal. I also saught professional help and it seems im at the lower end of the scale but well on the way to it becoming much bigger if i keep it up. I kicked Ciggs, Drugs now its the Drink next is Porn god i have problems, the last is worrying as it has a big hold over me. One step at a time though eh!

Anonymous said...

Be sure you have a vitamin regimen in place. B vitamins, D, E, C, magnesium oil for the anxiety and to help you sleep. Alcohol really knocks the nutrients right out of us, and deficiency perhaps is the reason it's so hard for some to quit and not for others. I also take lecithin and milk thistle extract for liver support.

After dosing with vitamins for 6 months (while still drinking daily), I was able to finally just walk away. No cravings, no anxiety, no depression.

I continue with my vitamins and liver support to heal what I have damaged. Clean up your diet, supplement, eliminate chemical triggers like fast food, and you will have a much better go of it.

It's not about will power!

Anonymous said...

Hi, brilliant posts on here. I spent my whole youth from 14-28 drinking , doing drugs and smoking cigs etc. Felt like it was cool i was the main man! I am 12 days sober and like every one else it is hard, your mind trys to drag you back because it gives the illusion that the pain of stopping is greater than the pain of just carrying on with the cycle of drinking l, being hungover and depressed! Once you realise from within and make the decision that quitting is not the most painful route ( i do feel meditation helps enermously, you tube has some great meditations, just try them and make your own mind up) you will be able to make the change and leave that old crap life behind. Its not easy but as long as you know the alcohol is where the pain is not in your new energetic, fantastic life then any thing is possible. Good luck

Anonymous said...

I am so grateful to be reading this blog. I am absolutely paralyzed from my fear of EVERYTHING. My apartment is in shambles, I cry all the time and just want to isolate. I know I can never drink again or I will die or worse kill someone else. I just got my second DUI and am trying to see and accept that it happened so I can get my shit together but I just wallow in self pity and self loathing. What keeps me going is seeing how people who have made a commitment to stay sober have better lives. In retrospect even when I was making good money, could buy whatever I wanted, lived in a nice place I NEVER was happy. I have to believe all of this pain and suffering will bring me to a better place and more inportantly will make me a better person. I believe in God so I have that going for me but the despair and lack of desire for anything makes it truly seem unbearable at times. Thank you.

hmm said...

Thanks. That's the "you should do something with your life now" feeling. And doing something, well: hard.

Rob said...

If you're on this blog because you want to quit and you wonder if it's possible the answer is YES, YOU CAN QUIT!!! - - and you will not miss it!

July 19 2012 will make 4 months of total alcohol sobriety for me! I have NO cravings. It seemed impossible at first, but now it feels impossible to ever drink again! I can't believe I'm saying this... If you would have told me 6 months ago that I'd be on a stop drinking forum celebrating my sobriety writing a cheerful post at 4am about how I'm alcohol free and how happy I am about it I probably would have laughed... and then punched you for being a liar...BUT HERE I AM - - Sober and glad to be alcohol free! : )

I drank heavily for 10 years and thought I enjoyed it, but deep down I absolutely hated it... a part of me knew that in reality I was destroying all of my human potential. I felt sick and foggy all the time...exhausted, self-loathing, chronically hungover.... It just flat out sucked.

I was drinking every day - - usually 5 to 15+ drinks per night depending on how wasted I decided to get. I would occasionally go on 3 or 4 day benders where I'd consume upwards of 4 750 ml bottles of liquor... it shocks me to think of it now... WHY DID I DO THAT TO MYSELF FOR SO LONG? It's disgusting. It's no way to treat yourself.

The crazy thing is that I was "functional" - - fully employed college grad with numerous side projects and a big circle of friends... but I was hiding the seriousness of my drinking problem. It was easy to blend in with drinkers. I would hide my drinking by alternating bars every day so that no one saw me at the same place two days in a row... I would hide my bottles... and conceal how many drinks I had ... why? I wasn't happy with it and I knew I didn't want to drink, but I FELT POWERLESS to stop.

Finally I made my decision - - I could quit, and I would quit... immediately.


How did I do it? - -

I HIGHLY RECOMMEND a book by
Dr. Joan Matthews Larson -
"7 Weeks to Sobriety"

Dr. Larson is of the mindset that "alcoholism" isn't a problem of character... it isn't a curse ... it isn't a destiny written in your DNA - - - it's a serious medical issue with underlying biological problems that should be treated as such.

If alcoholism is a disease, then why does modern medicine offer no CURE?! - - Alcoholism is the only "disease" the patient is expected to cure him/herself by TALKING about it! How much sense does that make?

Dr. Larson offers a groundbreaking perspective on "alcoholism" and following her advice worked for me.

CONTINUED...

Rob said...

CONTINUED....

Dr. Larson offers a groundbreaking perspective on "alcoholism" and following her advice worked for me.

This link is not mine, and I'm not making any profit from it in any way whatsoever... nor am I affiliated with Dr. Larson in any way.... I just want to share the knowledge - -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYichmlfuZ4

The things that helped me: Exercise, family, non-drinking friends, LOTS OF VITAMINS - & OMEGA-3 Fatty Acids, plus a few other supplements... it's what worked for me. (I didn't go to rehab or AA or a psychologist or take any prescription drugs).

It was a strange adjustment at first. I felt weak, tired, mellow... then gradually more and more exhilarated...Like my body and mind were coming out of a chemical prison or dark fog... Two weeks was a magic number for me... it got easier and easier... I gained CLARITY, SHARPNESS, RELAXATION, & ENERGY! - - After 4 months my brain is firing away... It's as though I'm making up for lost time... if I were to list everything I've accomplished in my 4 months of sobriety you'd think I was making it up! - - It's been that great! I can even spend time around alcohol and it doesn't affect me - - NO CRAVINGS! - - I drink a soda water with lime or a non-alcoholic "beer", laugh at all of the drunks, and thank myself for doing what was best for me! :)

So to everyone out there who wants to change but thinks it's impossible, IT IS POSSIBLE - - IF YOU WANT TO BE WELL AGAIN YOU WILL. YOU WILL FIND THE WAY!!! YOU WILL DO IT!

Jenny said...

I am so grateful to all of you who share your stories, struggles, trials and triumphs. I do completely believe in the power of a person to achieve what others may deem impossible. This means ANY person, because each of us is immeasurably powerful IF we do not succumb to the numbing effect of the established conventions of disease and healing, of what others tell us is possible or not.

I can testify to the importance of nutrition in this type of healing/recovery ... I'm not very good at recovery yet, but I have felt AMAZINGLY better taking recommended supplements, whether I was cutting down on alcohol or not. I believe it would be very wise for anyone to incorporate certain supplements into your healing plan. And I DO believe it is helpful to think of it as a HEALING plan, rather than an "I have to do this" mentality ... instead, acknowledge "I WANT to do this, because ..." and then add your own myriad reasons....always focus on the positive. And ALWAYS believe you can. Please contact me if you would like to stay in touch -- dmcloren at the Y dot .... com. Peace and love ...... =D

Anonymous said...

Hi all,

37 and been drinking heavily since I started working in the City 16 years ago. Out of the City now (thank God) but took my bad habits with me. Managed to kick coke years ago by dumping all contacts but the drinking is definitely harder as it is everywhere and harder to avoid. Sick of feeling like crap every morning, regular anxiety attacks, drinking alone. This is a great blog. One thing I would suggest is mega doses of vitamins, specifically B complex with Selinium. Seems to help me anyway. Good luck all. B.

Anonymous said...

I can't believe I'm writing this! I can't believe I have been drinking one/two bottles of wine a night for approx 20 years and convinced myself it was ok! My husband drinks we have a drink as soon as we get in from work. To relax. Then every morning I wish I hadn't. He is away at the moment and I just decided I have had enough of drinking. Only 3 days but feel in control of my life again. First day had banging headache but fine now. Keeping away from supermarket as I know I will be tempted to lift a bottle! Don't intend going back to old habit when hubby returns!

Anonymous said...

I want to quit. At the moment I drink to kill the boredom...An to cry. I swear I feel no emotion during the day unless I hear a sad sad song that almost puts me in tears or I drink heavily. Clan MacGregor has a jug that I think is about a gallon of scotch. On a bad night which is any night I drink it. I'll drink half or more of that jug in a 2-3 hr span. I'm 26 yrs old and trying to quit. I just get so bored and needing to feel some kind of emotion that I have to resort this to end the void I feel.

hmm said...

Why are you so desperate to escape boredom? If you know drinking like you do is harmful, and you only do it to escape boredom, well shucks, just be bored for a few nights. Suck in the boredom like food, breathe it out like fire. Find a few movies worth watching. Relish in the boredom. Own it. It is your boredom, and you're just avoiding it--probably a worse sin--if you drink your way through it. What's on the other side of boredom that's got you so worried? Would you rather be dead than uncomfortable?

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this blog. I'm on day 1 of sobriety. I have been sober one time in 10 years for 2 weeks straight. That was about 7 years ago. I remember the clarity. I can't wait to feel that clarity once again. I have learned so much here in the past 40 minutes reading these posts. I can and will do this.

Anonymous said...

Frank...Day 1. Feel energetic as I slept like a rock last night. let me get through this day sober.

Anonymous said...

Frank...Day 2. I did it. I did not drink a single drop last night. Woke up today feeling pretty dog gone good. I'm going to go for a bike ride after work instead of drink. I must have fill my idle time with healthy things.

hmm said...

frank, day 2, post when you get to day 3. how was that bike ride, refreshing? keep charging up your battery!

Anonymous said...

Frank....Day 7. the bike ride was perfect. the endorphin release really heped me forget about drinking. i feel great so far. i tend to fool myself when i feel this great and think i can have a drink. i need to work through that mindset.

maisylu said...

So glad I have discovered this forum. This is only my third day off the booze and am feeling better but can't stop thinking about the drink. My family are all huge drinkers and it has been part of my life for so long, binge drinking and having hangovers. Am retired now but held down important jobs when I was a "functioning alcoholic". My weakness was wine - and anything else if there was none around! I really want to succeed and have a holiday alone booked in three weeks time on a Turkish gulet. Luckily I don't know anyone on the trip so no one will assume I drink. My husband is an alcoholic and encourages me to drink which has always made me weak.

Look forward to keeping in touch with you all.

Anonymous said...

Hi, I'm on day 11 and it is tough.. I've been drinking for about twenty years the last ten were the heaviest I am now 34. I've given up drinking and smoking and believe that only through abstinence can I truly be myself. I recently lost my job from being drunk on the job, infancy I can't even remember being there.. This has made me really look at my self along with other stupid irresponsible things I have done. I will be honest to say the I have felt deep self loathing over the last few days, I don't want to hate myself but I think I do. I feel tiered and emotional, my sleep has been serverly disrupted so this is all accumulateing and making me feel awful. But after saying all that pretty depressing stuff there is something in me that wants to heal myself, without trying to sound to drippy, some part of me is really trying to take control and that is what is keeping me going quite literally. I've suffered depression since I can remember and now I have to face some pretty dark monsters but I hope that the side of me that wants to change and look after myself will win this time over. Good luck to everyone who is trying to make them selves better. X

Laurie said...

I am on day 34 of no drinking and it's been a rough road so far, but worthwhile. I've been drinking heavily for about 10 years (roughly 2 bottles of wine almost daily). I decided to stop after 2 DUIs, endless hangovers, morning heart palpitations & anxiety, and humiliating episodes in front of friends, neighbors and coworkers. I honestly can't understand how I've managed to be functional! I feel so much better and am restoring a sense of self worth and am finding joy in things i loved but couldn't find time for when drinking! I am doing better at my job than i have in years! I'm taking things one day at a time now but this feeling is great. My 34th birthday is Thursday and I love the fact that i will remember it! Be well and good luck to everyone!

Anonymous said...

Well said. Im on day 1....

Anonymous said...

AA

Anonymous said...

I found this blog on a search. For whether anxiety and depression were normal when you stop drinking. I have been treated for both on and off for years but had been symptom free for some time. I have been very tired since I stopped drinking and about a month into sobriety, I began feeling depressed and anxious. I started on vitamins b, d and a multi, and some amino acids and that seems to be helping. I need to start exercising, I certainly have the time now. I am also trying to eat lots of fruit and vegetables and keep the sugary snacks to a minimum.

Next I need to find something to replace the euphoria I felt being out and drinking. All of our activities involved drinking, so it's hard to think of things to do without drinking.

Anonymous said...

I have been 26 days sober. I started a diet to change myself. It is hard because havein 5 or 6 shots a day of Tequila was not good I started drinkig more this past year. It was hard at first, but it gets easier and better :-) I am happy now in order for me to change things in my life I have to change what I don't like about myself first. And not wanting to drink is the most imprtant thing to me. I was afaird to be like my dad who was an alcoholic . I picked up my bible and asked the Lord to hold my hand. He couldn't make it go away but I needed his strength to stop. Thank you Lord for leftover me lean on you.

Anonymous said...

Oops meant Thank you Lord for letting me lean on you lol. I am back to my dorky self. Lol

Anonymous said...

It is day four for me and I feel as though I could have written your post..messy house, anxiety, self loathing, fear of risking ones life or someone else's..I am in tears having found this blog..it is a bright light..I am reading so much as therapy...last nite a book called women's bodies , women's wisdom..by christiane northrup...another favorite is called the four agreements. Books can bring sanity..also writing. Most important of all are my passions...art , surfing , skiing, mountain biking...when I think of my passsions they are a thousand times more fun than a nite of drinking. Find a great book as a friend and dive into a passion! Love and live and respect your body and I will strive to do the same. Thank u for this blog xo


hmm said...

Keep holding on everybody.

Anonymous said...

I'll be 49 in a few weeks. I've been getting on it, to varying degrees, since i was 16 and went to my first punk gig. A family history of Irish heritage laid a path for excess, fun laughter and booze. The english blood is straight as a nevada road but still embraces the extremity of strive and succeed, win at all cost. It's excess, just in a different package. I've run my own business, worked for many established company's on the way and never missed a day of work, never called in sick or received any sort of work related disciplinary. Most relationships have been co dependant but you don't know that till you come out the other end. I read one of those crap facebook slogans the other day that suggested you deserve the relationship you need at that time in your life. works for me. we may of been co dependant but we had a right laugh. The dichotomy is i'm a food freak who juices and eats all the right things. i don't touch fast food eat that much meat. I fully aware of my organs and my excess and their in lies the problem. the wine problem. I can drink 2 bottles of wine with ease and not really be hammered. the wife and i used to split 2 bottles she'd have a glass or 2 i'd do the rest usually just at the weekends. fair enough doesn't sound to bad. i never get hangovers, never get grumpy...well some times and generally maintain. this summer has been different. we've had the football, olympics, family, friends guest and ex partners. every night has been a tear up. the wine consumption has been running at probably 10 bottles if not more a week and i feel like hell. Every organ feels swollen and pancreatic cancer is on loop in my head. I'm a week sober now and have started to feel slightly better but can't sleep which is driving me crazy. I look at my wife and daughter and adore them so much but realize what a selfish fuck i am by doing this to my body and mind. We have this beautiful existence in the country and i'm rolling the dice in the hope that i won't get sick. what a dick. Fear is a great motivator and regret a willing bed partner. Imagine the legacy of resentment and loathing I'd leave behind if i died. How did your dad die? oh he drank him self to death. the shame.I'm going to clean up for the next month and get myself straight. Unfortunately it's my 50th next month and all my mates have organised a bash for me....see i've already got my excuses cocked and loaded. the future i know must follow a path different to how i have lived before. i don't need god or therapy. I just need to stop boozing, do yoga, meditate, eat right and not be a twat. been a right laugh though! Mx

Anonymous said...

said is now free from street fighting and coming home late ,ill concentration at work ,less enemies ,free from abusing my dearest and the nearest ,..its been a year now since i have quited drinking i used to be involved in street fights bad things etc ..since i was 16 now i'm 24 with a fresher and much focuss approach to life

Anonymous said...

Hi all. Thank you all for sharing. I'm day 7 and let me tell you, I almost caved today. My ex husband tortures me and I was so crazed I almost went to the store. But then I ordered pizza and pushed through. Thanks all for being here. Peace

Anonymous said...

I'm 51 and quit drinking over a year ago, after the first couple of weeks it got easier. Now I don't even miss it. These days they have some great non alcoholic beers on the market, so after 6 months sober, I tried some and now enjoy the taste of a cold beer without the dopey, sleepy stupid, feelings that come with alcohol. These days I'm much happier, more active, sleep way better etc. I can honestly say I don't miss it and will never drink again. Try Clauthaler and St Pauli NA beer, you'll love it, if you miss the taste of a cold beer.

Anonymous said...

Got fed up with myself, decided I needed professional help. Found a therapist who told me after one session I drink because I am bored and I needed to do something with my intelligent mind instead of drinking. What a paradigm shift! I AM smart! She helped me figure out what to do and now I am enrolled in college and looking forward to a future filled with promise. By the way, I am 50 and have a husband, family, and bills. You gotta do whatever it takes to get rid of the alcohol obsession. Everything will fall into place.

Negi said...

Thanks for great information you write it very clean. I am very lucky to get this tips from you


Quit Drinking on your own

Anonymous said...

I'm 32 years old and have been drunk almost half of them. Trying to quit for the fiftieth time.I'm a week sober and hoping that I start feeling better soon.every day I force myself to go on walks and try to eat right. I just have no energy and am really down. This happen to anyone else. And how long did this awful feeling last?

Anonymous said...

Hey anonymous, I'm right there with you. Day four and I just feel groggy, tired all the time. No energy. Slept 15 hours last night. Wanting to binge eat. When does it get better?

Anonymous said...

I am 43 years old and I have been drinking since 18 years old. I drink when I feel good about life and drink when I get down in life. I'm tired of drinking and the guilt and regret the next day. I was told one day long ago that when I quit my vices, that I will feel better. What that dude meant was that I will feel my highs better and my lows better. I am going to take that challenge. I want to feel everything better and I want to stop running away from a good life. I'm ready to be the person God created me to be. Its been two days since I stoped drinking. In my heart I can feel its time. I'm ready to start living and stop running from intimacy and the people who love me. I am ready to start initiating relationships in stead of isolating myself and running from the feeling of not being good enough or from the fear of being abandoned or rejected. Thanks for posting all the commnents. Very helpful. It is time and I am ready. May God bless everyone here

Anonymous said...

Sober 8 wks. now. Alcoholic for 50 + yrs. Quit drinking abt. 30 yrs. ago, and wife accused me of going to AA meeting to meet women. Said hell with it and started drinking again.

Now, I have risen above the excuses and reasons for drinking, and so far have abstained. The reasons and excuses are still present and I am having hell coping.

How can a man cope with the bullshit without drinking?

Scott said...

You cope because you have the desire to feel better and to live life fully. I'm over a year and 3 months sober. I used aa for like 3 months. I didn't agree with the system and dogmatic nature and I liked doing things on my own, but looking back the message was useful. I haven't been back to aa, but I recommend therapy to figure out new ways to cope with life. I went to aa cause I thought it was more of a support group and then I went to therapy once a week for about 9 months. Learned TONS about myself and who I am. Couldn't be happier with my choices. Don't give in. The best is yet to come, I promise you. It's always darkest before the dawn. Have faith that sobriety is what you want and do whatever it takes to keep it. That's what kept me going.

Anonymous said...

I am 31 and have been drinking for the last 8yrs. I wud drink at least half to a bottle of whiskey/vodka and smoke about ten cigarettes every night. I have a good job and didnt let drinking interfere with my Job or life. I liked the taste of alcohol and i believe it helped me to cope with the stress and digest the pathetic world around me. my bottle was a good friend to me but I knew I won't be able to continue like this for a long time and I will have to pay the price at some point. I recently found out that I am going to be a father and my whole world changed up side down. This is my fourth night without alcohol and cigarettes. I stopped drinking to save some money, to be healthier and to live a bit more longer for my child. Tonight I struggled a bit and couldn't sleep and also had nightmares last night. Have a headache, feel like I am catching a cold and my throat is sore. I dont remember the last time i have been ill. I had four packets of crisps today and ate more than I would normally eat but i am still hungry n feeling miserable. Just had a bowl of cereal at about 3am. I am determined to stay sober and hope this feeling goes away. I went online to look for withdrawal symptoms and found this blog. It is easy to share with someone who understand what u r going through. I hope all this is worth it.
p.s English is not my first language therefore I apologise for any mistakes.

Anonymous said...

CALI said: Sober for 2 days...after drinking for 23 years (increasing more heavily as the years went by). I am now 39. More recently, I found myself drinking 2 bottles of wine or 1/2 a bottle of scotch some days. 1 bottle of wine became a light day (similar to what 1 glass of wine use to be). In social settings, who knows how much I drank sometimes...enough to forget my actions the next morning and embarrass my husband. I am functional - a corporate VP / lawyer, mother of two and married 11 years. My husband travels out of town during the week, so it has been pretty easy to hide the bottles, late night drinking binges and hangovers. I used a coffee mug often, so my kids didn't know I was drinking alcohol (as my husband would ask them if I had been drinking). Luckily, no DUIs or accidents; however, a lot verbal abuse/rage/broken items...I drank for quite a few "reasons" - to forget things I experienced as a child, reduce anxiety, alleviate stress, escape boredom, cure loneliness, raise my depressed spirits, be more friendly, become comfortable in my own skin, relax, reduce irritation, handle my husband, cope with the pressure of raising two children and managing a career while my husband is always out of town, etc. Today has been really hard - I feel anxious, nauseated and tense. My jaw is clenched/sore and I have a dry mouth and scratchy throat. I can't concentrate on anything and I am incredibly irritated by everything - I have no patience. My husband was very supportive of my decision last night when we spoke, but today he was cold and nasty - telling me I have to take responsibility for my own actions and to stop feeling sorry for myself. All I want is his love and support to help me be successful in my mission to stop drinking. I initiated this myself - there was no intervention. However, when he talks to me the way he does, I just want to hide in the bottle as I have done for so many years. I am trying to focus on my personal strength and determination, but it's really hard.

Anonymous said...

Been 12 days now after drinking daily for 18 years, I just finished another pizza and will probably sleep another 10 hours tonight. But the feeling of being free from an addiction is worth the grogginess. I no longer feel like a slave to drinking. I feel immense will power this time around - when you do it for yourself and no one else it is really empowering. I suffer from depression and insomnia and the drinking was a bandaid that really made things worse. I won't miss going out with people - I am an introvert =) And I realized, I will save $300 a month.

Anonymous said...

CALI my hubby is the same way too. And in the past that would make me go back. I just repeat to myself this is for me and no one else. I think when you change habits, even bad ones, loved ones can get a bit freaked out. So I am in my little computer room away from him with my pizza crumbs. Even though I love him a lot, I need my own life too.

Anonymous said...

23 days ! How exciting to find this site! I feel great...a little bored, but it's winter and dark early. I'll figure out how to get unbored soon : ).
Last night I slept like a baby through the night. It was great.
My friends are still drinking, I pour and mix cocktails but I know that in the morning I'll remember everything and feel rested. I even found out that someone I knew casually didn't drink either...imagine that, I would have never guessed. People stick with it. We need more people on this bus! Enjoy!
I would like some additional ideas for drink alternatives. Water is good but I still have taste buds. Something low in calories.

Anonymous said...

just found this website, some nice reads. I am currently over 2 months booze free, and when i take the time to think about it im really happy with the decision. Im 30 years old and have been drinking heavily since 15, with very few breathers in between. From my current experience i can say that for me, the first month or so feels a bit chaotic on the nerves. at first it feels hard to stop drinking, then after a week or two (probably different for everyone), it starts becoming exciting to think of the freedom of not having to have awful hangovers, which is unfortunatly what led to the decision for me to stop. Anxiety and depression initially got worse when i stopped drinking, and my mood was all over the place. I felt emotional for no reason. I worked out like a maniac for the first month, and it helps, then started switching my diet to eating pretty much raw vegan for a couple weeks and got off the caffeine. the diet helped an incredible amount with my energy levels and overall feelings of sanity. after a month the excitement phase sort of ran out, followed by a period of feeling sort of bored and wondering what the hell i had been doing with my life, but don't worry if you are reading this, cause this phase also passes. At the moment of writing this i can tell you that the effort i have put into not drinking and increasing some healthier lifestyles is paying off. The decision to eat raw vegan actually had nothing to do with quitting drinking, but as a side factor ended up helping my mood immensly, so i plan on continuing to eat extremely healthy most of the time, as the positive benefits are too numerous to ignore. Im not a fan of categorizing myself to things, so i can't say that im on a specific diet now, but overall eat healthy and excercise because it lifts my mood and boosts my confidence. and if your struggling with extremely low self esteem when you quit drinking.... no worries mate, it's just the booze working its way out, and it's a process of finding your way again. i have plenty of friends who drink like crazy, but don't get hangovers, depression, or too many of the negative sides of drinking. Im just not fortunate in that category, so im guaranteed to get down if im boozing heavy. Once you decide to quit boozing, because YOU want to, then you can spend time focusing on other aspects of your life that you would like to improve in, and move the focus from quitting boozing, to all of the benefits you are gaining by stopping. it might take a minute, but you'll run into plenty of non drinkers when you stop, and you will also meet plenty of people who still drink, but want to stop, and you might catch yourself helping others to get off the sauce, if that is what they want. anywho everyone is different, but i would say excercising like hell, and eating like a health freak, will speed the recovery process ten-fold. Plus looking at the booze thing from a different perspective i.e.- instead of feeling deep in guilt and regret, move onto all the future benefits. if you need to cry, cry. eventually you will be laughing, so hang in there and be the motivation for the next person in line. kind of went on a rant here hahhahah, but it's my first time writing about it so hope you got something out of it :) good luck people

Faisal said...

7 days ago I nearly died! Dramatic right? I drank two glasses of wine, ate dinner, then drank a bottle of very fine whiskey with a friend of mine. Then went to anothers friends party where I drank nearly half another 700cl bottle (cheaper whiskey). Maybe somebody put drugs in my drink in the party (its certainly a possibility) but whichever way I lost consciousness at about 2 or 3 in the morning... After reading all the posts above I can certainly identify with a lot of them. I gotta go out now, but I will definately post again very soon!

Faisal said...

8 days without a drink! Yes, I had the physical after effects associated with drinking enough alcohol to nearly die! Physical pain too because someone who cares enough about me not to leave me on the street carried me upstairs. That left me with deep bruises and muscle pain! But after the hangover wore off, I had the dizzyness and weakness mentioned in a lot of the comments above!!! Its true, pizza really helped along with a lot of other junk food. But now I am getting malt drinks (for the vitamins B), lots of fruit (vitamin c) and drinking a lot of water also helped. I did exercise on saturday (if you are following the time line thats 8 days after my experience!) which left me feeling tired and sore but today I feel great. Its also true that I am moving away from my "alcohol" friends and looking for new reasons to live. Thanks to this blog I have a place where I can be totally honest!!! Thanks for reading and stay strong!!!

Anonymous said...

WOW! You really did express it perfectly! The cycle...the anxiety /shame....the insidious nature of the poison! I felt like drinking today....so I cleaned closets(SO not me!!!) It did help to feel productive but I needed immediate words of encouragement from people who "get " it. This was perfect...thank you for sharing! Everyone else too...we are not alone!! We can do this!!:)

Parker said...

I had a realization the other morning that the way I treat my wife after I've drunk 2-3 bottles of wine is basically domestic abuse, I'm not physical in any way, but from what she says, I make her feel she has to walk on egg shells based on how I might react . I'm rude , aggressive, hurtful, just a nightmare to be around. Of course I don't remember everything, I remember I slight "disagreement" usually, and sweep it under my alcoholic carpet, pretending nothing happened.
I've had enough.
I can't lie to myself anymore.
As of today I start my cutdown program, should be able to not drink in 5-7 days.
I gave up before for 2 1/2 years, loved it. All the things you've all said happened, I lost friends, got fat, then got fit.
I stupidly thought after that period I could control it so started again. Guess what?? Of course not, otherwise I wouldn't be writing this.
I'm tired of this, I can't remember waking up and feeling ok.
I intend to sort myself out.
Good luck to you all.
We don't need it, we just think we do |||

Parker said...

I meant alcohol we don't need that not luck, that sooo didn't look right.

Anonymous said...

3 months sober, first stone sober new years.... ever :) thank you all so much for this site, and for posting, Im sure some of you don't even know that you have helped me with your posts, but you have all helped motivate me to stay on the sober path, so thanks again everyone. if you are just starting to quit, hang in there it gets better, you have a chance to re-define your life, and if you will stick through the first few months (and be ready for a roller coaster of emotions) the light at the end of the tunnel WILL start to shine. I hope that everyone who try's succeeds, and i know that because i can do it, you can do it. If you fail on the first attempt, just try again, and again and again and again, and even though i don't know you personally, you have my support and admiration because i know EXACTLY what you are going through. HAPPY NEW YEARS: THANK YOU ALL

Anonymous said...

Been through some trouble and all drinking related and still kept doing it and now don't have
Much room for error. On day 14 of not drinking...longest in my life...felt horrible at times, real clammy & sweating
Felt like hot dragons breathing in my eyes ...dragon eyes and hate it. I think I van keep going and had to break habit of
Trying to stop and have a few beers & sometimes vodka for happy hour and sometimes mote than I thought I would have resulting
In leaving my vehicle and riding bike next day to pick up vehicle.
My wife gets freakedbwhen she does not see vehicle when she gets home from work and don't like to scare her, so pushing hard to not get in that situation
Stay strong

Anonymous said...

On day 14 and so far my lo best dry streak, goal to get to 30 and seenhow i feel
Yea lots of headaches and feeling hot & sweaty
Kept thinking I could handle drinking and liked how it felt to knock a few back but then hadbto many and next thing you know little incidents would happen and sometimes could not remember what happened.
Lost my license a few times, been to jail a few times, had to sleep 3 weekends in a row in dam jail awhile back, but still came out thirsty . Loved the ice cold draft beers at end of day but must make changes and the vodka did not help either, I hope & pray I can keep my dry streak going

Simon said...

day three of being sober, I feel so tired and when I return home I feel bored, I turned to drink after leaving the Army after serving abroad in Afghanistan and witnessing some disturbing events, it got to the pint were I was drinking 4 litres of cider a night, but the problem I'm having no is I remember my dreams so vividly but I must push through for my family this blog is brilliant I just hope I can man up and do this!

simon said...

I even managed to replace point with a pint in my previous comment!!

Anonymous said...

hey simon, congrats man. keep it up, the beginning is the roughest, but it gets wayyyyyy better the longer you stay sober. the boredom will eventually fade away, and if you can find some positive things to fill the time spent drinking then it will be a huge benefit. you can try excercise and eating healthy, and try to learn something new about each of those, or if you have a hobbie to get into you can focus on that for a bit, just stay with it and you'll be greatful that you did. trust me on that, cause i remember the boredom well in the beginning, and now am out of it, so good luck brother, we'll be here for you

Anonymous said...

Three days sober- know that doesn't sound impressive. But after 10 years drinking 8-12 drinks a night that's ok for me. I honestly can't remember being sober for 3 whole days in a row.

Anonymous said...

I was alcohol free for 6 days from new years eve,had managed past the 72 hour withdrawals. Which are always the worst for me. I am 52 and have been drinking two bottles of wine every night for almost the past 10 years. Then I stupidly bought two bottles yesterday. I woke up this morning feeling sick and horrible and cringing with embarrassment because I had phoned a man who has made it very clear he is not interested in me. Tonight, I did not even feel the slightest urge to drink, long may it continue. I love this blog, just discovered it tonight and will be back tomorrow to read about how everyone is getting on. Alcoholism can be very lonely once you have alienated everyone with bad behaviour. Don't give up giving up x

Anonymous said...

Quit counting days! That's an AA thing that keeps you focused on what your missing instead of what you're gaining! Forget about it! Move on.

Anonymous said...

Quit counting days! That's an AA thing that keeps you focused on what your missing instead of what you're gaining! Forget about it! Move on.

Anonymous said...

Hi

I came online this morning to try to figure out why I feel so awful after not drinking for one week. I realsied over the holiday that I haven't been properly coping with my life for many years. Managing, but struggling, and alcohol has been the reason, and the excuse for a lot of that. And I knew my health was really suffering.
So. Thank you for sharing, because I have a little hope now that things might start to feel better.

Anonymous said...

I hid my drinking as u did too. I would stop at bars on my drive home , gladly order dinner for pickup and then slam a few at the bar as I waited for the order, sneak down the basement slam a few then hide the empty bottle for disposal when no one was home. My usual was to stop at Walmart, grab a six pack for the way home , slam 3 in the parking lot and hid one in a coffee cup for the ride, on day 12

Anonymous said...

I'm 49 and have been drinking on and off ever since I was in HS. However during the last 10 years I started drinking every night, usually around 10 beers and sometimes I would drink a glass or 2 of wine. I appreciate the comments and realize I'm not the only one. My routine is going home sitting in my favorite chair and drinking until 9:00PM and then eating dinner and going to bed. I haven't been happy with myself for a long time and finally decided to make a change, it's been 3 days. I hope I can make it.

Anonymous said...

Started at 16 and have not stopped for 23 years. Last 10 years have gotten out of hand. 2-3 bottles of wine on a good night, 4-6 on a bad and all the while holding down high powered jobs which only encouraged it. Relationship is suffering, health is suffering, enough is enough.
Day 15 now. Days 1-5 are the worst by far. Anxiety, fatigue, living in the bathroom (yes it trashes your stomach), hallucinations, nightmares, emotional outbursts and a brain screaming endlessly for a drink.
Days 5-10 are better. A little. More energy but endless anxiety and lethargic periods which are the closest I've ever had to out of body experiences. Chocolate bars have replaced the wine.
Days 10-15 have thrown depression into the pot.When not depressed am argumentative and quite frankly plain nasty.
BUT now moving into days 15-20 I feel a corner has been turned. My brain has given up screaming for drinks and for the first time I feel truly I just might be able to do this. A long way to go, but hell a start is a start.
Thanks to all on this blog. This stuff is deeply personal and it helps a lot to know there are others going through the same journey.

Anonymous said...

5 days sober. Got into the habit of drinking a bottle of wine per night for the past 10 years to ease my anxiety. The longest I've gone without a drink has been 18 days. The cravings come at night but I know that I cannot give in. If I give in to a drop of alcohol, I will binge drink....I want to be sober and FREE. I will begin taking Magnesium for depression (apparently it cures depression and eases cravings for alcohol)....also Vitamin B6, Vitamin B 12. I've also immersed myself in a spiritual program/studies. The key is to replace bad habits with positive ones....and finally FREE.

Anonymous said...

Have been a 3 glass a nighter with wine and thought I was doing OK when I skipped a night here and there. But after skipping (thinking I could do this regularly) the next night drinking, I'd drink the same amount I'd had before - and yearning for even more. But I've realized these next day headaches that linger until 3pm and the crispy eyes and puffy face just make me feel and look awful. I got disgusted with myself. I bought a bottle of wine, drank 75% of it, poured the rest in the sink. The next day I bought another bottle, did the same thing. And then yet again the next night did the same, this time drinking more than 75% but pouring what little remained in the sink. The money I wasted, and the headache and swollenness and brainfog - my weekends ruined by this! The next day - three days ago - I stopped. I'm reading this blog with appreciation for all your comments and encouragement. I'm exhausted, but I'm glad to see that's not unusual a withdrawal symptom. So I'm allowing myself to lay on the couch here and watch basketball and football games and read and do not much at all this weekend while drinking diet cokes and water and eating right. I feel like this time I might really quit for good. Am going to keep checking back here whenever I need your help. And you are, indeed, helping! :)

Anonymous said...

I have been sober for 7 days, today was definitely the hardest. I know it gets easier because I quit for 9 months a few years ago. I felt great so I decided to have a beer while on holidays, guess what, I still couldnt handle it. Gotta do this for my son because he is struggling with some issues but fighting back like a champ. he doesn't need a drunk Dad.

roger kent said...

9 days has been my record off the sauce for 15 years, new start tomorrow, wish me luck

Anonymous said...

Hi everyone, iv been sober for 27 days and its the longest iv gone without a drink in 15 years. Im 29 and used to drink anything I could get my hands, I would drink to not remember. Im feeling healthier but depressed some days but very bored most days, I need a hobbie. Any suggestions on the boredom and depression. Please help!

Anonymous said...

One day at a time Roger, it gets easier after a while.

Anonymous said...

Spouse quit drinking cold turkey 15 months ago. Spouse continues to be angry short tempered anxious not sleeping etc. Been to MD- meds for depression, anxiety, and sleep.Really no better- not sure how much more I can deal with. Married 27 years but at the end of my rope. Anything helpful?? Desperate!!! Please no more criticism....I get enough of that!

hmm said...

Spouse needs proper amounts of omega 3 fats. Serious amounts of flax seeds, coconut oil, fish oil, etc.. Nutrition messes with mentality for alcoholics. Watch the sugar intake, system deals with it similar to alcohol.

Anonymous said...

Wow! Very similar. 2 or three beers from fridge in shop after work, 1 for the road. Crack one from basement fridge like it was my first and walk in to see wife. 1 with diner, Sneak and slam 1 while she put kid to bed, then 3 or 4 more before bed....that was routine normal day. If I was out to drink, usually 15+ beers. Over the years, totaled 2 cars, 3 minor accidents, no DUI's. 37 years old. Just watched best friend of 37 years (yes from diapers) die suddenly and by surprise to me of liver failure. Guess she hid some of her drinking, too. 3 days sober now, feel a little tired but happy to have my first solid poop in many many months! Nice to feel in charge for once, sorry it took somebody close to me to die from it. The bloody ventalator tube, puffed up body, and yellow eyeballs were kind of a shocker and made me angry at the whole booze sceen, something positive must become of her death and for me it may be a second chance. Never really even tried to slow down, may try to moderate after I am done with 10 day sober goal. But I suspect if I go back, you will see my posts at a later date.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous, spouse may need to check into a detox clinic, I hear what you are going through and it is not easy at all. Years of alcohol abuse can really screw up a person and it may take more then simply quitting drinking to get it out of his system. I am sure he cannot help how he feels but he needs help soon for both of you.

Anonymous said...

So guys I am drinking tonight, I failed, three weeks sober it was awesome I am an invesable drunk, no one can tell when I have had too much to drink, and I do not get a hangover Hope I can start over tomorrow.

ageingstudent said...

Keep trying. You made it 3 weeks and you can do it again. I had the same problems at first as I was a closet drinker also. Try an AA meeting if you can. They don't bite there and I find them very helpful. Lots of people with success stories there willing to share what works for them.

Anonymous said...

35 days and counting for me, you learn to realise sobriety is not boring, only boring people are boring. Live life.

Anonymous said...

I've been drinking since about 12. I had a few sober years between 16 & 23 while i was pregnant & kids were small. When i finally got a car, all hell broke loose since i had full access. Im now 35. I hate that I love drinking. I love the taste & feeling & inhibition i feel. That makes it extra hard to give up.I've probably had maybe 2 weeks sober once a year or so after having an embarrassing episode. I dont know what its gonna take but I'm trying again. Its been about 24 hours.

Anonymous said...

Been drinking since I was 16, only gave when I was pregnant with my 3 kids and even snuck in a few. Am 39 this year and I want to quit, feel disgusted with myself for drinking, fat, low self esteem etc used alchole as a crutch, but now am tired of this crap. This is day 2 for me, no sleep, cranky, hungry!

Still smoking but intend to give up this Friday! Smoking has helped with the boredom, but now starting to panic! Your comments are inspiring, and defo help to keep me off the drink! Thank you all.

Barbarah

Anonymous said...

30 yrs old and sober 23 days. Gotta be honest it sucks right now. Anxiety along with the boredem is killing me! Used to have about 2 bottles of wine every night after work and even more with friends on the weekends. But Im tired of feeling like shit in the morning and having a faded memory all the time. I know there is more to life than getting shitty all the time, I just need to get thru this part! Almost went to the liquer store tonight, instead- I just spent the last hour reading comments on here and just want to say thank you ALL for every posting, really feels good to read them and be able put down some words during a rough time. Thanks again!

Anonymous said...

You have just described me! You have given me the push to do it thank you

Anonymous said...

Hi, I'm 51 & used drinking to numb my life. Have been trying for 6 years to quit & this is the 1st time I have lasted longer than 3 weeks. It's been 6 weeks now. I last drank New Years Eve. Felt terrible till 5 weeks sober. I was drinking 1/2 to 2 bottles of scotch a night for the last 14 years & realized the only way I could quit personally was cold turkey & away from people. Herbs, cherries & walking the dog at dusk help. I still have headaches & exhausted & emotional but way better than I was. I rarely crave alcohol this time Round & having chocolate or coffee if I do stops the craving. Drinking heaps of water helps with the headaches too. The point is, don't give up.

Anonymous said...

48, im a horrible binge drinker. Last weekend almost did me in. 2 days without a drink but that is typical. I have gone for weeks but when i breakdown I go all out. This weekend was by myself, guess what i did. I did everything watch movies, visited some bad sites on the internet. I just called my friends to tell them i have had enough, no more booze. I am worried and scared. I've lied to everyone about this.

Anonymous said...

I know how you feel. This is such a lonely, scary journey. But don't give up. I'm now 6 & 1/2 whole weeks sober & for the 1st time in 6 years of trying I think I've made it. I've just started using accupressure points for all the withdrawal symptoms ( wish I did from day 1). You can find them on the Internet. Tonight even my headaches are gone for the 1st time. Hang in there & only surround yourself with positive people. Wish I had found this site before. Beter late than never. It's so good to have people you can relate with. AA just scared me too much though other people love it. If I can do it finally, we all can :))

Anonymous said...

Did you feel tired and hav sore muscles after 5 wks og sobriety?

Sonia said...

I am 6 weeks w/o my normal 6 glasses of Chardonay per night
I am so fatiqued. I feel like I do when I am beginning to get sick. Why am I tired when I sleep better. I am dragging.




Anonymous said...

I'm 7 weeks Today & the same. They say it's because your brain's electrical activity is so used to overworking itself to get through the numbing of alcohol. Now it's overactive without that & the sugars in alcohol. Plus your body is so used to alcohol it's working overtime to remove toxins & heal. I'm a bit better than at 6 weeks & not so breathless doing chores etc. I even quickly up 2 big steep flights of stairs & mowed the lawn without much problem. Wow! Now that amazed me!

Anonymous said...

I never thought I'd post anything on these blogs....42 days for me! And yes you get all tired and grumpy, headaches, skin oozing out crap from your liver and body as you clean yourself from the inside out.

You are able to use your mind better, forget things less often and actually enjoy freash air, cups of tea in the sunshine, just being more physically active instead of drowning anxiety with a bottle and then dumping caffeine on top of the booze to somehow satisfy your basic knowledge about how the body works (depressant followed by stimulant cancel right? NOT!)

Seriously, your body on excess is a disaster waiting to happen, find a way to get off it, you'll feel so much better..

Anonymous said...

I've been sober over 16 months after drinking almost 20 years IM only 36.I don't hang around the same people.and find things to do to keep myself busy.I will never look back.IM a mother of 5.they have their mom back

Anonymous said...

Day 5 for me. Ive got really weird itching on my hips and my face looks like its sun burned. Im 35. I feel insanely tired but I know I can push on through. Friday looms and I know its going to be hard. Gonna stay the course though and clock back to let you know on Monday. Gonna do my first full week and weekend off booze in decades. How sad is that?! Great blog. Will keep reading.

Thanks

happyending said...

Day 2 and it feels more like 200. I felt so great this morning after my first non drunk sleep in 3 years. But as soon as it was time to eat, watch tv, pay bills, surf, clean house...I was anxious and craving my wine. I always told myself I was such a productive "good" drunk. That's when I got my mojo going and got it all done. Look out cuz after a few glasses I am gonna be scrubbing floors, doing laundry, making amazing gourmet meals, doing homework with my 8 year old, organizing the school carnival spread sheets for our next mtg and being fun mommy, time to do Just Dance 4 and I rocked it! Let's fast forward to after everyone alseep and I really start to drink, cuz now it's time to relax. How about a few stupid and even damaging Facebook posts, emails, texts. A few of which cost me the best job I ever had. Oh crap did I just piss my chair/bed the floor again? Yup time to get up and hide the evidence. Only a few hours til I have to get everyone up, fed and to the school bus, off to work, then feed the pets and try and find a new job. Not to mention ruining the family summer vacation because of my drunken dramas....making my husband cry because of the mean things I say to him when I am drunk. I also gained 70 pounds after losing 150 after having gastric bypass. I take full responsibility for my addiction, but this surgery cost me everything. I never had a problem until i had the surgery. I would rather be fat and sober than a slobbering skinny drink any day...and ironically I'm back to being a fat drunk now. Well until 2 days ago because I am DONE. My family needs me and I am falling apart. I am so ashamed at all the time I wasted and all the hurt I have caused. I know I need to look forward but right now reminding myself of the bad things is keeping me from driving to the liquor store I know all too well that is open til midnight every night. So tired of hiding my wine boxes in my car so I can take them to a dumpster. So tired of worrying what time I can have my first drink. Oh goodie, we are home from school and it's 3pm and I dont have to drive for the rest of the days so it's happy hour! So tired of feeling like hell everyday and feeling like the only cure is another drink. I am already freaking out about a big Irish Wake with my crazy drinking family next week...then a weekend fundraiser with all our drinking couple friends, a couple of concerts we are going to, a trip to Florida in April blah blah blah. But failure is not an option this time, it just can't be. I have to figure out a new way to live. I consider myself lucky it was only 3 years of complete chaos, and I dont want it to turn into 13 or 30. This blog is so helpful and I can relate to so many of you. We are all in the same club. A good friend helping me through this said his sponsor told him "you are not required to take the elevator to the bottom floor, you can get off anytime." My plan is to take it to top again, I remember what an amazing view there was up there:)

erectz said...

I admire what you have done here. I love the part where you say you are doing this to give back but I would assume by all the comments that is working for you as well. Do you have any more info on this?

male enhancement said...

Thanks for informative post. I am pleased sure this post has helped me save many hours of browsing other similar posts just to find what I was looking for. Just I want to say: Thank you!

Natural male enhancement pills said...

Dude.. I am not much into reading, but somehow I got to read lots of articles on your blog. Its amazing how interesting it is for me to visit you very often

Anonymous said...

Sad? That's amazing! You should be so proud of yourself, like we all should be. Baby steps till it gets easier. The first step is always the hardest. Well done :)

Anonymous said...

Yeh! I can't believe I've been sober for 8 weeks. 1st NY resolution I've ever kept. Last drink was NY Eve. I've been to hell & back but am finally feeling on top of things. I'm motivated & got more energy. Still got a way to go, but am getting into the garden more. Had a headache today & a big glass of water fixed that. A handful of cherries or blueberries eases the sooking I still get & eases body aches & pains. At present I have a handful of frozen blueberries in my cereal each morning. I've even bought a blueberry plant among other fruit, herb & veggie plants. Addicted to dandelion leaves out of the garden too lol. Love that they all self seed. Evening walks with my neighbour really helps too. Light at the end of the tunnel.

Anonymous said...

Thank you all for sharing. On day 5, and I'm so tired, bored, and SUCH a cranky bitch. I eat healthy, started yoga and exercise... And I can't barely get a civil thought in my head. Trying to hide it from my family, but I can tell I am hurting their feelings. Thought of giving up tonight, read your posts and see this might be normal... Gonna stick with it.

Anonymous said...

51 days and counting! Love the posts, so much in common here. I have so much energy now, lost 9 lbs doing nothing but eating healthy and no beer. Mind is so much clearer, no joint aches anymore, even had a bunion disappear! Love life, love the kids, we have so much fun now. It's well worth sticking it out, you'll be amazed!

Anonymous said...

14 days sober after 20yrs drinking/smoking/coke ..... Hardest thing I've ever done!! Taking some amazing little red/black capsules which seem to take away the anxiety & the thurst, along with a vitamin combo..... 1st week was pure hell, sweats, shakes & walking round in a daze... 2nd week, feeling a little better, the need has gone but the want is still there, finding it very hard to fill my time, I've been signed off work for 2wks so far & looking for another 2wk certificate this afternoon as still taking meds.... Reading all the posts I realise I'm not alone, I'm finding it very hard to sleep & the realisation that the world does not evolve around me..... Looking forward to the 'feeling normal & healthy stage'.
Thank you all for sharing as it really has helped.

Anonymous said...

I've been drinking a few beers or glasses of wine a day for about 3 years. Lately, I've found I want a beer when I get up, and every time I come home - 3-6 a day! Two days ago I realized I've got to quit! Yesterday I felt like crap - headaches, nausea (big time!), depressed. I hope I can stick to this.

Anonymous said...

My friend, I tried stopping on my own for 12 months, but never could, my drinking went from strength to strength & finally got the better of me 2 wks ago..... My wife took me to the doctors and I was amazed how willing they are to help, the meds really work & I'm feeling better.
If you can't stop on your own visit your doctors I'm sure you'll be pleasantly surprised, once you've got over the embarrassment the rest is good.
Good luck!! ;)

Anonymous said...

By the way mine was the post before yours 4.02am (even though I done it 9.30am this morn)

Anonymous said...

Thanks! I may go that route. My last physical I lied to the doc and said I was drinking 2 beers a day. She said THAT was too much! It's got the point where I would rather have a beer than nourishing food - and I've always been a bit of a health nut! I know it's because I'm depressed.

Anonymous said...

Well today is my day #30. Decided on my own to.go.to.a.detox. was fringe 3 very large bottles sometime cirroc but that made me mean then I swithched to.plum.wine.... well id.drink.all night and living in Vegas id be up.and want ing a drink. At 6am Seriously having just ending a horrible abusive and controlling 7 Yr relationship since Dec. 5th. Tons of emotions poured out of me for months. Only thing is now. I am.just so.so very fatigued. Guess getting to the gym.will def help.ally.I have been over doing. The chocolate cAfFINE and nicotine BUT HONEST TO GOD HAVINV A WARM LOVING FRIEND WHO.CARES AND LOVES ME IS MAKING THE DRINV UNDESIREABLE.... CIRCUMSTANCES LIVING SITTUATIONS RELATIONSHIPS AND A SERIOUS FEELING OF ABANDONMENT HAD LEFT ME IN A VERY BAD PLACE. IM.SO.GRATEFUL.OVE STOPPED
LOST MY HOUSE AND ALL MYY MONEY. NOW IM READY TO TAKE MY.LIFE BACK : ( JUST WISH I WASNT SO TIRED. HANG IN YOU CAN HAVE A GOOD LIFE AGAIN ALCOHOL FREE. I BELIEVE A LOVING FRIEND TO TALK TO.AND SHARE ALL YOU FEEP.SEEDING EMOTIONS REGRETS YATTA YATTA YATTA. WILL TRULY BE THE ANSWER TO FU RECOVERY. YOU NEED TO BE PAMPERED NOURTUED AND LVED BACK TO HEALTHYMIND AND BODY. ITS BEEN SO.LONG SINCE K WENT 30.DAYS. GOD BLESS GOOD LUCK.AND HANG IN THEFE YOJ CAN DO IT

Anonymous said...

It's easily done (drinking rather than eating) it takes/took away my hunger & problems, I guess I was getting the calories from the alcohol & didn't really care ... the only problem substituting alcohol for food has/had gave me a physical dependence.

Its a catch 22. Beer = depression/depression = beer ... be careful you don't go too far as you may have no choice to visit the docs!

Genuinely hope you can sort it out
.


Anonymous said...

Sounds like you've had a rough ride, friend! Thanks for your kind words of support. I am not alone, and have caring friends - I just haven't told any of them - yet - what my situation is. 2 days, no alcohol. I don't consider myself an alcoholic as I don't like most alcohol. I'm even very particular with the beer I drink (only IPA - thanks!) LOL! It's a habit. I like the taste, and the mellowing of my emotions. A little "reward." Yeah. I know there's a lot of emotions stuffed down too. I want to get out of a mountain-top and have a god scream for all the pains of this poor world - the sad stories of abuse. I can't read these anymore as they make me feel so helpless. helpless. yes, I am. But I am in charge of my own body, and I'll take care of it. I won't buy anymore alcohol. If it's not here, I won't be tempted. Like I don't buy cookies any more. Be well.
And, yes re: beer for breakfast - the calories are there, but not the nourishment! I'm getting healthy. Cheers (with a non-alcoholic beverage!)

Anonymous said...

Day 23 .... Tough day today but encouraged after reading this blog

Anonymous said...

3 weeks, one day...can't believe it! It has been the toughest day-to-day, minute to freakin' minute thing I've ever done.
What I've noticed most is how exhausted I feel! I have lost over 10 lbs...no appetite. Sleep is immediate, dreams are extremely vivid but no nightmares (always had nightmares when drinking). Got sick right after stopping and started taking Airborne for it...decided to keep taking it daily for the vitamins & minerals. Taking a vitamin b & d and drinking lots of water. Started walking but don't have much energy (yet!) for much else. BUT I FEEL BETTER THAN I HAVE IN YEARS!!!!!!!!!
Can't believe how much time/$ I used up drinking...my schedule is soooooo wide open and that is one of the toughest aspects. I didn't club. Mine was all behind closed doors, alone, alone, alone. I justified it for soooo long...each week I would rotate the stores, finally buying bigger & bigger bottles to keep from having to go to the store for it so much...backfired, I just drank more.
Thanks for being here, I lurked for awhile because I couldn't believe someone would have the guts to blog so honestly.
Not doing this with a group, no-one knows. I have to celebrate each day away from my drunken self quietly...but God I smile a lot more!!!!!!!! Getting stronger each day...
Thanks for being here. Take care of yourselves. K

Anonymous said...

2 weeks with no alcohol.. for someone who has drunk as much as me is a great goal . from my early 30's i drank more and more. now in mid 40's and time to make a change. when you dink every day 60 to 90 units a week its time to change. i first started only drinking on weekend and last two weeks none . i have lost weight and seem to have a lot more energy to do things.its not easy to do as you need a great deal of willpower. you have to do it for yourself and your family , give it a try and you might live a lot longer ....

Anonymous said...

12 days without drinking. I'm 41, been drinking very heavily for the last 8 - 10 years, pretty damn heavily before that.

I'm finding going to sleep when I feel like drinking useful. Also, very handy, is to drink a glass of fruit juice IMMEDIATELY upon waking up.

It's a little hard to translate the whole of an experience because so much feels unique. Over the last 10 months or so I've looked into a large number of self-help approaches -- really, uncovering the causes, sources and misthinkings which have given rise to the boredom and helplessness which promotes drinking and other unproductive or self-destructive behaviours.

So far, the hardest thing to get used to is the idea that everything we do is a choice. It's an obvious revelation, but also a stern and unyeilding one.

Even doing nothing is a choice.

Anonymous said...

TJ,
I have been drinking since I was 16 and am now 46. My poison of choice is beer and I take those tylenol pm with it. This is a horrible mix and I'm sick of it. Today is the day. I still have a few beers that I did not make it thru last night. Plan to throw them out with the empties and begin a new life. Very scared at this point but also very excited at the possibility of life clean and sober. I also smoke cigs and have an addiction to porn. Big mountain ahead of me but this blog helps and is very inspiring. Will be back tomorrow to report on the first day sober. Thanks to all for your posts.

Anonymous said...

Never been a heavy drinker, but just recently getting out of control. Day 4 alcohol free. Feel very tired and a bit low....but reading your comments is normal and gets better. Take vit B complex and D. Heres to a happy alcohol free drinks this summer. :-)

Andy L said...

My routine was to buy 6/7 cans of strong lager on my way home from work every night. I was straight on it as soon as I got home before my my partner came home. I would hide the beers in the back of my van and sneek out and down a full can in seconds. Then eat late about 9-00. Go to bed and wake up thirsty about 4-00. Then not able to sleep feeling anxious. Get up for work at 7-00. Then I was usually sick. Go to work with no breakfast. Got through a days work and start again with the drinking routine. This has been every night for years. Stopped drinking on 28th feb. Determined not to get back into this habit but it is hard. Good luck

Anonymous said...

This is my fifth night sober. Been drinking heavily, and I mean to thr point of passing out, at least 4 nights out of the week for the past 15 years. I've held down high position/high stress jobs all the while rolling into work either so foggy I couldn't perform throughout the day or still slightly drunk from the night before. I'd lead business meetings and not have a clue of what I had just said. Met my fiance three years ago and he slowly pulled me out of the bar scene (kicking and screaming - not literally). But in the meantime I introduced him to my nasty lifestyle (tons of booze/ocassional coke). I think he felt as long as we were doing it at home and we were together then what was the harm? Over the past 1.5 yrs we've now turned into a couple who comes home and 'unwinds' with several drinks. I'll talk about quitting/he'lk talk about quitting and then one of us will eventually cave. "We're so weak!" We'd cackle with laughter. "Oh well. Tomorrow will be different." Except last Tuesday was my tomorrow and all of a sudden a switch has been flipped in me (part of my wake up call came from a blood test that said my bad cholesterol was high. I askef the nurse what the main cause could be and she said alcohol abuse. Oops. I recommend anyone getting this test. It could be the scare you need). I let my fiance know I was going to stop and he of course naturally said "me too". Except he's brought it up grabbing some cocktails a couple of times. I dont think he understands I mean business. I have a TON of fears but I think the biggest is our potential not to connect like we so often did (perhaps superficiously) while drinking. Does anyone have experience with this? What was the outcome? BTW regardless it will not change my mind. I have got to do this for myself or I can never ve the person I know that is inside of me, waiting to break free.

Anonymous said...

5th day sober for me after about 2.5 years of drinking more than I know is good for me. When we moved to Europe from the US for my husband's job, it became just part of the lifestyle where we live to drink wine with everything (a french region). I'm a compulsive, "creature-of-habit" kind of person generally, so getting into a regular routine of drinking wasn't the best idea for me. But I knew something had to stop when I faced the reality that it's been coming up on 2 years that I've put away a bottle, sometimes a bottle and 1/2 of red or white wine 5 nights a week. The depressant effect was starting to really drag me down during the days after...i got tired of feeling like utter crap five mornings a week, hung over and unmotivated to do the otherwise healthy things I enjoy, like exercise, hiking, writing and cooking. Began worrying about just what kind of effect the drinking would eventually (or already) have on my body, inside and out. I knew this finally had to become more important to me than the few hours of forgetting and buzzing in the brain at night with the wine, only to wake up dying up thirst and feeling guilty for behaving belligerently towards my husband, staying up late and stumbling into our bed hours after he was already asleep. And for what? I'd ask myself every damn day recently. So five days ago something sort of snapped in me and I just felt more ready than ever to live sober. The first three days I felt beat up and beyond lethargic, just exhausted. But mentally, quite good. Sharper, clearer, more like my true self. Yesterday I felt less tired, and today even less so, with a level of energy I haven't felt in a very long time. I've been more patient and optimistic during these past five days, consistently, than I have in the last two years, which has been wonderful for my marriage. So things are going much better than I imagined they would. Perhaps this really was the "right" time, the time I'd be "ready" to make a positive change. Still taking it one day at a time but I believe in me, and all of you as well. Life has already gotten better and I truly believe it will continue this way.

Peace,

SwissSide

Anonymous said...

3 days in 3 hours....spent the last two days reading every post here. I relate to almost all of them. Day 1 and 2 not terrible but now on day 2 plus I've been eating everything in sight and my afternoon nap turned into an all afternoon nap. My workout routine was painful but I got through it. I read about Vitamin B and D here but not sure how much to take. I bought b complex and d 5000. I took one of each tonight. I had to drive by the liquor store to get it and it was mildly tough to get past that. I just try to remember how bad I feel after drinking both physically and mentally guilty. I'm just trying to focus on getting through each day now and not being too hard on myself for sleeping more or eating a little bit more. I've drank heavily since I was 16. I'm now 46. In the last 7 years I've been drinking everyday and at least 3 heavy drinks. For a period it was 1 - 2 bottles of wine because that was suppose to be healthier right? I don't know why I made it this far. Successful in my love life, career but maybe not in building friendships. I used to be a big extrovert and have grown to be a huge introvert. Blah Blah Blah.....I love this blog and it really helped me get this far anyhow. 3 more hours, then onto day 3 plus moving toward 4. Will I make it a week? The weekend is going to be a huge test. Saw some people say Pizza helps. I find that funny. Pizza helps with everything and after eating pizza they are right, I'm too full to think about drinking! Perhaps some pizza is on order for the entire weekend. I'll let you know and when my brain stops spinning I will be more clear in communicating my thoughts on this blog. I hope to continue to see others keep writing. AA is a good place for support but I feel like it's their way or I'm a failure and won't fit in. I don't want to hold hands in a circle and pray. Just saying it's not me so pretending that is me would drive me to drink!

Anonymous said...

Exercise helps! I would rather not go the Pizza way. If weather permits - go for a run or a long walk.

Anonymous said...

I'm 49 and closing on 50 fast. Started to reflect on the last 50 and decided that booze was the common denominator in everything negative thats happened to me. I have two children and a great wife; I need to be a better role model. I was drinking roughly 1 bottle of wine a night; more on the weekends. I've been a week off it and aside from a bit moody, no change. In my younger years i've had 3 duis and more embarrassing moments and mornings than I'd care to remember. Time for a change.

Anonymous said...

I'll the 3 days and 3 hours guy. I guess it would help to give myself some tag name to identify the story line. I guess the name Mike Adams will do here so as to tie the story line together hows that?

I had some really weird dreams last night but made it until today now 3 plus days going on 4 w/o booze. I know I will be challenged several times this weekend but I'm mentally picturing myself ordering that diet coke or ice tea instead of a cocktail with my dinners out. Seems to me imagining it ahead of time helps. i plan on telling people I am not drinking because of medication that I am on. That is a true statement. I REALLY shouldn't be drinking because of the medication I am on. 3 - 4 heavy drinks a night maybe more on weekends, who knows what damage has been done over the decades. I am ready to face the challenging situations and move forward so wish me the best.

My mind continues to play with me and tell me that if I can go several days and just drink on weekends what's wrong with that? I know it's not right is all I can say for now but the memories of the many good times as a happy drunk keep calling. I'm trying not to answer that call. Like the person before, I do have plenty of moments of behavior I certainly regret in hindsight that were totally influenced by alcohol. Things I have done, said, emailed or text. They do not represent the brand of me that I want to sell. As I look at 50 ahead of me, I hope to reach it with a point of dignity and maturity. I have to remember that I am not 25 anymore and somethings 25 year olds get away with doesn't work for a 46 year old. I just want to be a respectable person and I know boozing it up makes it very easy for me to disrespect myself and others. Hence the ability to distance friends and obstacle to new friendships. Yes I am rambling but I'm thinking out loud why it should be so important to cut the ties with booze all together and why I should stop listening to that call that says I can handle it here and there. If I could it wouldn't seem this hard I guess. I thought I was having fun and relaxing. I know it's not good and not right. I am just damn lucky nothing truly detrimental has happened yet to me or anyone else because of me. I don't know how I dodged those pitfalls but I know it's luck not because I'm don't have a drinking problem. I guess I just got smart about how and where I drink to avoid those situations. Thankfully, I guess, I have always been able to afford a cab and leave the car behind when I know I'm going to a happy hour or party. Yup, damn lucky. Can't say much for the cab driver who had to listen to me on the way home but I know I tipped much better than I would have if I were sober.

So yes onward and upward. Yet another day to focus on and keep my mind focused on everything good about the day that does not include booze or how to focus on the good about the day without booze. So while I may still have a pizza this weekend. Rest assured, I am keeping my workout routine steady no matter how painful. Today was much better for that anyhow.

I intend to check back here to see what new posts are being written about all of your experiences. It really does help to read and write about this process so far. I am starting to think about my next post, will I say I failed or will I say I prevailed? I won't have an opportunity to update until Monday night or Tuesday. A road trip to some friends hence the dining out part for the weekend. I'll let you know how it goes and look forward to continuing to read about others challenges and triumphs.

Take care,

Mike Adams

Anonymous said...

Oh. my. goodness...5 weeks and a day!
Have continued to lose weight. No appetite still. Guess I shouldn't complain about that!!! Still want to sleep whenever I get the chance but noticing that when I am up, a lot more energy...a lot!!! Now I am remembering things that make my face burn...when I was drinking I thought I didn't have a life - it was my life - the sad part is that I rejected the life that was there waiting for me to drink!!! I have realized that I am being given an opportunity to feel everything again! Some of it sucks, like the yearning to numb up over anything emotionally tough. Some of it has brought me a glimpse of a kind of joy I haven't felt in years. Keeping busy is helping, walking/running is helping, drinking lots & lots of water is helping. I started a jar of the monies I would have spent normally on drinking and oh I can't (oh but I can!) believe how much money there is in a short time. If you ever want a more in-your-face reality check of how much $ you wasted drinking, just set up a jar and see how fast it fills up!!!!!!!!!!!
Still haven't told anyone, want to soooo bad because this is really tough to do. I am sure that there is a difference in me because I am more involved in everything, but because I drank alone & isolated myself there is no one to tell. And really, I don't want anyone that I meet or get to know now to know.
I AM DETERMINED TO LIVE OUT LOUD WITHOUT ALCOHOL.
Thanks for being here. Take care of yourselves. K

Anonymous said...

It's been 6 months for me now, after 30 plus years of drinking, I'm 57. Much too old to be acting the way I was. I witnessed many a friend over the years suffer and die. The craving for sweets, mostly ice cream seems to have replaced that of alcohol. A new job, some new friends, and a clearer head for sure, but most importantly respect from my 26 year old son. Good luck to you all.

Sodastream said...

Just read all the above blogs and yes it is good to read all the above posts and know we are all in the same boat and trying to stop and make our bodies healthier,
I started drinking in Europe 7 days a week twice a day when i was 23 it was normal, just a nice glass of wine with every meal. Then I had my own bar ( that helps )free access to wine and beer 24/7! So I guess I have always drunk. Now I am a 56 year old mother that drinks a minimum of half a bottle of wine to a bottle of wine at weekends. I tell myself that's acceptable I deserve it. That first glass of cold white wine that spreads calm through the body. It's my treat! For what I am not sure. I have always found the evening boring drinking 1/2 a bottle of wine minimum usually 2/3 makes it more relaxing, more fun. I have tried giving up in the week keeping my treat for the weekends but it has never worked. I bought for my daughter and myself a Sodastream and that has been the turning point. Mind i only started on Monday so 5 Days without a drink. I think that equates to 3 bottles of wine NOT drunken. That's £18 saved! I woke up today with a headache, still got it so went on the web to wonder how long it would take to heal my liver from 30 odd years of drinking. That is a lot of wine and money. Making my own lo calorie fizzy drinks has stopped taking the wine out of the fridge I am amazed how much I have drunk. ( I hate plain water.) I want to wish everyone well I know how hard it is.

Anonymous said...

Well I got to 63 days, then had a celebration drink...no big deal...next day was a weekend so bought some low alcohol beer....I'd had such a hard stressful time at work, anxiety just built up I suppose...well 2 weeks later I was back to old times again...more conscious now, I began to see changes that long term drinking does to you....my belly got bloated, face red when sober, my back ached, diarrhea, short term memory? what is that?...this was tough. I realized that I had to get control of this again or I'm in trouble...Good Friday was the last drink...only a glass of wine with dinner and I felt great...wasn't even drunk..mind you, the day before I drank 8 beers throughout the day....Saturday night I started to feel weird, very tired and oddly my knuckles had swollen...went to bed...Sunday was awful...big headache, no water would cure, diarrhea and then I decided to take blood pressure reading...it was like 140/100....it was awful, arms felt weird, weak...a big bowl of turkey soup broth and lots of water got me through and I realized that this was withdrawl like never before...I've read that your withdrawls from alcohol get more severe with more frequent 'dry spells'. My first attempt went very smooth and never had any of the blood pressure issues, so this is a big warning to me.

I'm on day 4 now and feeling much better. I've taken a good vitamin B complex and began some fresh ginger/lemon tea. belly bloating gone! no headaches and I feel re-energized again. I had terrible nightmares last night but i did get a reasonable sleep. I hope to keep up my progress towards conqouring this...its not the alcohol, it's the anxiety that somehow I think the booze will cure...I can't explain it. I think that most people who turn to alcohol have anxiety issues, that's the cause to fend off and conquor, then I'm sure everyone could enjoy a glass of sociable wine and not fall in the spiral trap...anyways, I hope I can do this. I'm really trying....

Anonymous said...

Week 5 and I'm scared I will cave in. I'm a 55 years old woman who enjoyed drink but terrified of health problems I might get if I continued.. The side effects I have experienced since given up drink kave been awful. I'm taking one day at a time and trying to think positive.I haven't told my family or friends as I am so ashamed of my problem. When I get to week 8 I will post again. Good Luck to everyone that's trying to give up alcohol.

Anonymous said...

Im a 22 year old girl.I started drinking young 15 I was in high school. Ever since many bad things started to happen in my life that were all related to my heavy drinking which just got worse every year. I was in denial telling myself it was just life and things happen i felt bad about myself everyday started waking up feeling guilty about not knowing what I did or said the night before. Quitting drinking at such a young age is so challenging because everyone is partying and they just think you are boring but in reality you start to think do i really need to be drunk to have fun?! That's just pathetic. Life is so much more than that and i dare you to try. Do it for yourself. I have been sober for 2 months and I feel a big difference and good about myself. It will just get better from now...

Anonymous said...

I just quit drinking myself and am dealing with the restlessness and not being able to sleep. If you dont want to be on meds like myself you should go buy some Kava Kava. Its sold in health food stores for about $10. Its helped me trememndously with sleep and anxiousness.

Anonymous said...

I started drinking a pint of vodka 5 years ago. Recently I've been drinking a liter of vodka almost every night. I got a dwi last summer which cost me a night in jail and $3000. My best friend died very young due to her alcoholism. Between those 2 incidents and the hangovers, guilt I felt, and watching my alcoholism destroy my family 9 days ago I decided I was done. The last 9 days have been a rollercoaster and very hard at times but also very rewarding at times. Physically and mentally I feel better then I have in YEARS. I know its going to be a long road ahead but so worth it. I deserve to be happy again!! I have found keeping busy helps the most. Talking about it with a loved one also helps so much. Going for a walk, getting some fresh air, taking a hot bath with music and candles have all helped me. I will beat this disease and I wish everybody the best of luck and want to thank all of you for sharing your stories.

Anonymous said...

THANK YOU ALL for sharing. It really helps to hear I am not alone.
Sometimes, This is how I read your comments:
Anonymous: I used to drink 2 bottles of wine a night...

MY THOUGHTS: "Oh, well I didn't drink THAT much..Maybe I DIDN'T have a serious problem. I only drank 4 bottles a WEEK!!"
That and I am a 100lb female.
OH DENIAL (:

Lately, I am seeing more clearly.
DAY #10 and am okay. Some Anxiety and mental stuff. Doing this with your help-Thank U! Ms.Wi..no..more

dave said...

been only a few days now. most ive been abstinent in 20 years. extreme tired, mainly at night, ears ringing,minor difficulty breathing, sweaty,and anxious. Think ill give it the rest of the week. see what happens. just started a new job, dont need the hangovers anymore. I like this blog, people doing it w/out turning into AA zombies.

Anonymous said...

I have been drinking heavily since I was 15. Now I'm 30. Today I am 10 days sober and feeling great. I was never a social drinker. I used to drink at home alone. 2 sometimes 3 bottles of wine a day. I say "day" not "night" because I would start as early as possible. I'm LOVING not having hangovers! My house is cleaner than it's ever been and I wake up much earlier than I did before quitting. My complection is looking better than ever! I used to drink before and after work. I gained a lot of weight since my drinking got heavier a couple years ago. I have been a little irritable and get headaches since I quit, and the nightmares suck, but it' s temporary and if I continue to drink, I'll feel awful all the time, no matter what. I'm taking it a day at a time, and often I have to tell my "inner selfish lady" to shut up. I'm hoping that eventually she'll pack her stuff and leave for good! Well, thank you for reading :) Best of luck to you all! Sam

Anonymous said...

I've gotten to the point that, I'm not interested in drinking a handful of mixed beverages to get drunk and go out. I feel so lethargic that I just want one or two to make me feel "normal". My anxiety has become so bad that every time I leave the house I feel like I'm going to have a break down. I've been cutting back and I refuse to drink during the day anymore, but then I'm so overwhelmed that I can't leave the house. It's hard to walk to dog around the block. I've had anxiety and depression issues all my life but never this bad. I feel like I'm living in a dream when I'm "sober". The worst part is that I starting a new job and I don't know how to deal with that, the anxiety, feeling so lethargic and constantly thinking that I'm going to have a break down. Any advice, holistic approaches? I want my life back!

Anonymous said...

I am on day 8. I am 41 and have been drinking since I was 18. Over the years, my drinking patterns have changed but one thing is for sure, it is a problem. From the outside I am highly functioning and have it all. On the inside I am a mess, I struggle to deal with stress and drink to get through. My biggest problem with drinking is I can't stop once I start, one glass leads to a bottle. I also binge eat when I drink, and can't stop until I pass out. I then wake up in the middle of the night with my body struggling to deal with all the crap I feed it. I have stopped drinking in the past and lost 30kgs each time. I just need to stop for good.

I know this is all wrapped up my emotions but I don't know how to unravel them. Ready this site helps so thanks for the useful tips.

Anonymous said...

I don't know if I am an alcoholic but definitely a problem drinker. Perhaps 2 or 3 nights a week I would drink. I am a beer guy and would drink between 8 and 16 pints in a sitting. Sometimes I would drive and sometimes I wouldn't make it to work the next day....hence the problem. I work hard play hard right? Isn't that what we all tell ourselves? I have a history of depression and anxiety which I have been medicating for about ten years. At that time my therapist convinced me that my drinking was probably a big factor in it along with bad genes and god knows what my depressed dad and broke upbringing programmed in my gray matter. I bought in went sober for a full year and was doing well. At one year the memories of my depression where so faded that I decided to start drinking again. That was about nine years ago. Just recently I decided to try and go off my ADs and relapsed. Back on the meds now and have abstained from the drink for almost three weeks now. Its so hard to end the day without the prospect of my anesthesia. I am listless and bored. I am unhappy now even as my depression lifts. Alcohol has been with me since 15 and has been such an integral part of my life. It has always been a consideration in all of my plans....when, how much, transportation, etc. I feel as though in saying goodbye I have lost my life's compass and am having a hard time finding my way through each day

Jeff said...

Hah, I was just going through some sort of insanity period and now i realize I am just on step 6!

Thanks man!!

Been sober for 4 months and my world has been turned upside down.

Anonymous said...

Today is my Day 1. I am scared.

Anonymous said...

Last night was the first night in over 5 years without even wine. I'm taking this one day at a time.
Thanks everyone for your experiences. It is inspiring.

Anonymous said...

Hello to everyone,

I came across this blog because I was wondering if I could lose weight if I gave up drinking. Of course I know the answer but I have been kidding myself for years. I am now 47 and about 2 stone overweight. I know all about nutrition and am very interested in all aspects of food and what it can and can't do for your body. As for drink, I have just been living in cuckooland. I can demolish a bottle and a half of red wine everynight and not even have a hangover. I have been telling myself for years that I will give up on Monday only to start again on Wednesday. I now realise I am not the only one with a dring problem and its time to sort it out. I have considered AA but am too ashamed. I would like to believe that I can do it one my own and it has really helped me these last 3 days to come home from work and read this blog. I helps me to face the night with a cup of tea and maybe a small treat. Its Friday night and normally I would get fairly sloshed after a weeks work and carry on for the weekend. This time I am more determined and I think I will manage knowing I am not alone after all. Put one the kettle everyone and lets just chill.

Anonymous said...

In 3 hours I will have completed 4 days straight. You what I am using to get sober - HATRED! Ok - before you prejudge me and starting being reminded of a Dark Jedi, let me explain. I have been binge drinking every night for the past 4years. I started hating how I was feeling about myself, I started hating how I was feeling sluggish and angry at myself for being so weak. I hated how I was such a great guy in pictures of the past and I miss that guy so much! I hate the shame that I carry with myself when I see my reflection. So this is my Hate letter to alcohol! I hate what you have done to me - Physically, Mentally, Emotionially, Spiritually and yes - Socially! F**K You Alcohol! Im taking my life back! Its not yours and I'm taking it back and im gonna kick the SH*T outta you in the meantime! Alcohol is basically as strong as Rome in the ancient world making me its slave! Well guess what - My name is Spartacus and SH*T's about to change! Join me brothers and sisters! I will not go this alone! This may have been dramatic, but another day without alcohol is a victory for me!
Now it's your turn in the arena! You think i'm a nut? Fine by me - But I choose Life without Alcohol and Freedom from Addiction!
After reading this you can think what you want about me, you agree? Gratitude! You dislike or disagree - well,.. I really don't give a f**K. And to hell with the anonymity - Joe Gonzalez!

Anonymous said...

Day 4 and its Saturday night. A first for me to be AF at the weekend. I have to say that reading this blog is the thing which has kick started me in to believing it might be possible. I keep telling myself I am not giving up anything, I am actually freeing myself from alcohol. It's kind of scary because if I think about making plans for the future, like the odd weekend away or a family occasion I kind of think twice about it because everything we do always involves drink. Can I really manage to be totally clean of alcohol. It would be fantastic to get to the point where the thought of it doesn't even enter my head. Do you ever get to this point?

valley evaluation centers said...

It's nutrients that it can give is the one important thing to me. I have nothing against it.

Anonymous said...

Are you still sober?

Anonymous said...

Day 9, still hanging in there. Weekend was weird, I had to totally change my routine. A first for me.

Michelle

Anonymous said...

Day 4 and not looking forward to TGIF tomorrow. The weekend is going to be hard and our fridge is full of booze. I've been drinking too much since I was 16. So far so good though, no physical problems. This feels right. I really hope I hang in there. Thank you for this blog.

Anonymous said...

Day 7 for me. Been sober probably a total of four years in 30; mainly during pregnancies. I feel great. Not sure why but it is peaceful for me, at least right now. Full of energy, sleeping well and hopeful. Today I woke up and said to myself, hello Lauren, met Lauren. I pray with all my heart I am done. Time will tell. I admit I put myself on Antabuse. I like it because the choice was made and I know I cannot drink so I have no anxiety over whether I will or won't. For me I would wake up everyday and say no more and then 5 would roll around and there I would be opening a bottle of wine. That choice is gone. I know not for everyone, but fine for me.

Anonymous said...

I a male and 32 yrs old. I was a heavy drinker and recreational drug user since 14. I suffer form depression and I am on meds. At Easter I decided I had enough. I'd drink to get rid of depression but everyone knows that this doesn't happen and makes things 100 times worse! I initially decided to quit for 2 months to see how I went. Well, I felt terrible for the first 6 weeks, up and down with moods, headaches, nausea, extreme fatigue. I also during this time decided to get off the meds, as I wanted to be totally clear of any substance so have been weaning myself off them, on the last batch of tablets now and its been hard with side effects. Entering week 7 and hit a turning point and I feel great. Clarity, focus and energy. In gym everyday, clear skin, realise I am actually bubbly, outgoing and crazy without booze! The 2 month goal has been thrown out and Im staying like this for life. with the money i have saved, i can buy a motorbike ive been promising myself for years! Disgusting i was wasting so much money! I just see good times ahead! Dont give up, believe me my reputation was a trash bag, constantly out of my mind. I have had to cut people out my life and fortunately i have a hot supportive girlfriend. I wonder how i ever picked her up when i look back, but she has been amazing. Anybody in my life who isn't interested in sober me can get out of my life! Its hard, and i have had some very low times and i expect its not over yet and will have my ups and downs, but the longer i go the more i feel i am winning!

Anonymous said...

I am a 24 year old female and have been sober for 4 days now. I am sweaty, itchy and have been crying a lot today but I feel good that I don't reek of booze and I'm not trashing my body again. I have been drinking daily since I was 19. It started off with a few beers every night then in college turned to 3/4 of a 750ml bottle of Smirnoff or 2 bottles of cheap red wine every night. I lost my apartment, my boyfriend, my job and just got my first DUI last week. If I keep this up I will be homeless. I want to drink so bad but I know I need to stop to turn my life around. Reading all these comments has helped me. Thank you guys.

flowers said...

Hi guys, Im on day 4, the longest ive gone for 14 years since being pregnant. I drank mostly every day, sometimes a few days without but not many. I drank 2 bottles of wine a day plus a litre of vodka at weekends.If I went out i'd take vodka in a water bottle to top up 4 pints of lager.A few months ago my feet and ankles began to swell, put it down to being overweight and not exercising, ignored it, it got worse, till i found i couldnt leave the house withou people commenting. So I stopped, made it worse. Then i finally went to the Drs, she said my lymphnodes werent draining toxins from my body.So she took blood tests and told me to call back for resuslts. I did, liver function test came back abnormal ( how i was shocked, i dont know) I have to go back in 10 days time. Mean while I googled it, and it seems its my liver not working, and it WOKE ME UP LIKE A SHOT I thought that up until the swollen legs I was ok, kept a job, had 4 kids, never appeared drunk, never had a hangover,didnt drink till 8pm , could stop for a day or so if i wanted to, so couldnt be alcoholic.But I stupidly never thought much about my liver. So now I have to wait to find out what damage Ive done over 25 years. So I advise all of you to go to the DR and get your liver function tests done, even if you dont have any symptoms. I know I will never drink again, I have 4 kids, I love them more than any drink, and cant believe how stupid and selfish i h ave been. I just hope its not too late for me to make ammends and restore my health. Im 41. Please pray for me x Jools

Anonymous said...

Very impressed with Flower's story and GOOD LUCK TO YOU. I have not been drinking for 5 months and feel great. Put on a bit of weight but so what. More focued and feel better about myslef.

Anonymous said...

Hi flowers,
I was moved by your post and I pray your issues will resolve themselves with abstinence. I have been a heavy drinker since my late teens, I am now 42, and recently had my own wake up call. I have no children, was divorced in 2005 (not due to drinking)and have been in a happy relationship for almost eight years and am now engaged. I have had GI problems since my mid-20's that have slowly gotten worse over the last few years. Worse than not knowing you had liver problems - I have known that my liver enzymes were elevated for over 2 years and did not quit drinking! I would just avoid my doctor and the bloodtests! Kept telling myself "I don't have to be retested for 3 mos so I will quit 30 days before and I should be fine". That was over a year ago and I still haven't been able to quit for 30 days, haven't even tried. Until now. I am on day 17 after my wake up call. I had been drinking all day, every day, mostly since my company closed and I became unemployed almost six months ago. I would drink for days on end, get violently ill for a couple of days (nausea, vomiting, diarrhea) and then slowly climb my way back up. Stay sober for a couple of days but as soon as I felt better I would start the cycle all over again. Then 18 days ago I binged heavily and started dry heaving then threw up blood. Freaked me out and went to the ER where they had to pump me full of ativan, anti-nausea, fluids and nutrients for several hours until I was released several hours later. My liver enzymes are very elevated and there's a real possibility that I have some damage, God willing no irreversible damage but we shall see. I had no edema like you had but it scared the crap out of me. It is humiliating to have to be treated for alcohol induced illness. NO ONE knows except for my fiance and my naturopathic MD. I detoxed at home and, thankfully, had only mild-moderate withdrawal symptoms. I am sober for 17 days and look forward to being retested at about 30 days sober. I am so thankful that my fiance quit with me, it really helps. He drank, too, but not like me - I wouldn't consider him an alcoholic although he feels he drinks too much. It is really hard to be home all day without drinking but I look forward to finding a job, hopefully soon, and am glad in a way that I've had the luxury of riding out the withdrawals without the added pressure of going to work each day feeling so awful. Things are much better now and I finally feel that I am ready to take on a full time job and get my life back in order. The liver is very resilient if alcohol is stopped and you take the nutrients necessary to help heal it. I take a liver detox (amongst lots of other supplements) made by Vital Nutrients called "Detox Formula" that I usually get from my naturopath but you can also buy it through Amazon for about $37 for 120 capsules. She highly recommends it and it has the nutrients needed to help heal your liver. It is all natural and I have taken it for a long time and experienced no side-effects from it (maybe diarrhea for the first couple of days as you expel toxins). She recommended I take 2-3 capsules 3 times per day. Just a thought or perhaps something you could run by your doctor and get his/her opinion. I will pray for your good health and hope you will do the same for me. Good luck and I hope you will post again when you find out any results. I will do the same. Best wishes to you in your recovery.

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed reading your individual stories of success and obstacles. I'm 26 now and have been drinking for close to 10 years. I've been a heavy drinker for at least 7 years. I drink a bottle of wine a night and would be fine the following day. My engagement was broken off recently because of my erratic behavior. I loved him so much but had underlying issues that could have been solved easily. He was the best thing that happened to me. I sabotaged my only true relationship. I lost my future husband because of a drinking problem.
I use to google the term "alcoholism" and feel as if I didn't fit into the category. Rather a "heavy drinker" but now I realize I've become an alcoholic. A glass of wine turns into 5 or 6 and the next thing you know empty bottle. Someone says something that I disagree with and all hell breaks loose. My boyfriend turned into a miserable and angry person. He needs time so I'm giving him space. Meanwhile, I'm sitting here reevaluating my life thus far.
Alcohol has always been a part of my life. I enjoy it and don't want to give it up. I'm fun and more outgoing when alcohol is involved.
The funny thing is that the drinking doesn't affect my normal life. I've been working most of my life and recently graduated college.
I moved out into a friend's house and I've been drinking a bottle of wine each night. For the past week or so I've been having a splitting headache. I'm afraid my liver has stopped digesting alcohol like it used to. I don't know if alcohol is to blame.
I'm looking for a professional job to further my career. Also, looking to take up other hobbies such as playing tennis and salsa classes.
I go to the gym when I can as well. Like I mentioned, alcohol doesn't adversely affect my daily life. But the problem is that the most important person to ever enter my life has given up on us.
This comment was longer than I intended.

Anonymous said...

I am a 42 year mother. I have been drinking on and off (in a normal social way) since I was in my 20. It got worse after giving birth and in the last two years I drank 1 - 2 bottles of wine per night. I have been functioning in my daily routine but got, due to being a single mom, very longely and bored at times. This is why I had increased my drinks. Yesterday morning I woke up and knew that it was enough. I gained about 4 dress sizes and I can't bare the look in the mirror anymore. Also, I got very tired of always feeling hangover most of the day. Last but not least, I can now safe lots of cash. I don't really have any bad symptons. Didn't sleep too well last night but am now dead tired and am sure I will sleep like a little baby tonight. For those of you who have cravings: Try spicey food like eating raw onions, garlic, hot mustard, chilli. That helps me if a little craving is around the corner.
Hang in there guys! I believe that a lot of us are not physically addicted to alcohol. It's the psychological aspect of drinking and the habit that makes it so hard to quit.
this site is great! I have halfheartetly tried to quit before. I think I would have given it a shot sooner would I have come upton this site back then! Will be back!

Anonymous said...

I drank 2 bottles on wine a night for 10 year. Most days I would wake up and say to myself that I would have a night off tonight and time and time again I failed. Stoping for just 1 day was the hardest thing in the world.
I attended the Allen Carr Stop Drinking One day course. I have just woken up to day 22 and feel fantastic. I have felt fantastic from day 1. No withdrawal no internal fighting, just freedom. Go get the book if you can't make it to London or Birmingham uk because it has given me back my freedom and I can't sign it's praises enough.

Remember it does not have to be a tough experience because alcahol does not give you ANYTHING,and therefore your not missing ANYTHING

Anonymous said...

Last night was my first night not drinking in years and it was horrible. I didn't sleep at all until 6am at which point I nodded off and had one of the most vivid, worst brief nightmares of my life.

It's almost 11pm on night two and I've got a feeling tonight's not going to get any easier. I just can't stop crying. I'm absolutely miserable but I'm not going to drink this second or the next one after that!!

Anonymous said...

HI
I'M AMAZED TO HEAR ALL THESE SIMILAR STORIES LIKE ME TO A t. I PRAISE YOU ALL, I WOULD NOT HAVE THE STRENGTH IF I HAD NOT READ ALL THIS. I KEPT VERY HIGH PAYING JOBS, BUT I GUESS I GOT INTO THIS WINE DRINKING ALL MY LIFE JUST LIKE YOU ALL TO RELAX PROBABLY BECAUSE EVERYONE IN MY LIFE STARTED DYING AND DID NOT KNOW HOW TO RELAX AND COPE SO I DID IT FOR HAPPY HRS. BUT WHAT TURNED ME AROUND WAS I REALIZED THAT THERE WAS NO ONE AT THE BARS ANYMORE BUT ME AND THE WINE SO WHAT WAS THE POINT, I WAS TRYING TO BE SOCIAL AND FIND HAPPINESS, PLUS I REALIZED THAT I HAVE A VERY BIG FIBROID GROWING IN MY UTERUS AND IT IS GROWN BY ESTROGEN WHICH IS CREATED FROM SUGAR WHICH STARTS WITH MY WINE HABIT AND I DON'T WANT TO DIE SO I AM ON DAY 5 FROM 20YRS OLD TO NOW 53. MY BABY BROTHER DIED AT 46 OF LYME DISEASE AND TESTICLE CANCER IN 2011 SO I DRANK 1-2 BOTTLES A NIGHT AND IT DIDN'T AFFECT ME JUST RELAXED ME BUT NOW I HAVE DIARREA AND THSI FIBROISD AND SCARED OF DYING SO I TRIED THIS BECAUSE I WAS TOLD TO GET ON AN ALKALINE DIET AND WINE MAKES ACCID, I HAVE SEEN A CHANGE IN MY BOWEL MOVEMENTS IN JUST 5 DAYS NORMAL NO ACID, BUT IT'S VERY HARD TO JUST DRINK WATER AND JUICE ~IF IT WASN'T FOR YOUR BLOGS....IT'S HARD AND I AM VERY TIRED THE LAST FEW DAYS, I WOULD EAT CHOCOLATE TO COME UP AND I HAVE GOTTEN OFF OF SUGARS AND CARBS ALL THAT GOES HAND IN HAND TO CAUSE ACID AND ESTROGEN SO I AM COLD TURKEY -86 ON ALL, VERY HARD..THANK YOU ALL VERY MUCH AND GOOD LUCK, TRY TO KEEP STRONG, IT'S FOR OUR BEST OR WE CAN DIE.

Anonymous said...

Hullo all:) Use to live in Manchester but now living in Austin TX USA. Been drinking off and on "hard" since 27. I'm now just 40. I fancied 3 or 4 pints followed by two large stiff vodka drinks. Well, I've bloody had it! No more! I feel like shite! I'm being honest here mates...
I just want be able to look forward to something without thinking of my vodks high.

Anonymous said...

Hey ya...I'm in the same boat mate! My ex sabatoged our relationship b/c I was being a proper cunt--due to being a right twat whilst drunk. Anyway...even though I caused most of the problems I know see she wasnt the most mature or emotionally available woman around lol. Ya see I attract shallow women for some reason...I'm working on fixing me yeah. Keep your head up luv! It will all end up aces;-)
Cheers,
Jacob

Anonymous said...

This has been a great place for people to come and visit and to hear the stories of struggle with alcohol addiction. I have been sober fo many years now. It wasn't easy pulling myself out of the darkness, it was not without pain. It was either I die and let this hideous beast rip me apart from this world or I grab hold onto hope. It's been four years. My life has been saved. I was able to rid the demon that compelled me to keep poisoning my life....ruining the lives of loved ones caught up in my sickness.
I live a full life without the urge, without the thoughts, without need. I have learned to cope with my stressors by adapting to healthy choices...ie exercise, prayer, friends. I can go out to dinner with people who casually drink and am proud that I choose not to. I only regret that I did not do this years and years ago.
I read many similar stories on this blog about how good people are trapped and frightened by their own addictions. Many begin their journey but never return after a few days or weeks....only to relapse and disapear (just my observation).
I can only say this...only you know when you are truely ready to quit. Dont fool yourself and think you can be an occasional social drinker...you can't. When you quit drinking, you need to quit drinking forever.
Try to talk to God on a daily basis and let him teach you how to better love yourself. Pay zero attention to your sick and twisted impulses. Those impulses will lessen by the day when you quit. Once you are initially sober you will have tremendous inner strength to move forward. The longer you stay sober the greater your inner strength.
If you cant do this on your own please get help. Dont be afraid to ask to be saved....and don't be embarrassed. It's your life for Gods sake...we all are here because we all want the same thing. A life that's is free from alcohol and free from codependency. Good luck to all of you....you could do this.. Love yourself more than anything. Happiness is just around the bend.
NYC Man

Anonymous said...

Wow! what a wonderful place to come and share...and learn. So many intelligent and accurate posts. I want to share a couple things that has 100% worked for me. Vitamins. I am absolutely positive this has made my quitting sooo much easier and I've read a couple of other posts that state the same thing. I can't tell you how important this has been in minimizing cravings. I didn't just go to the store and buy a whole bunch of bottles of vitamins and feel better. I started with a high potency multivitamin and then I bought a bottle of B-100 time released B-Complex....and a bottle of B-12...and then Ginseng complex, ect. I take these twice a day in the morning and at lunch. I keep a bottle of 1000mcg B-12 at my desk and take one every few hours. Everyone's different and I'm not knowledgeable about vitamins but I wanted to give an example of what has worked for me. The other is God. Feeling a closeness to God has really really helped me spiritually in my getting sober. All you have to do is align yourself with feeling close to God. That's it. Once I started talking to him things really clicked. Have a great day and remember, if all of us on here are doing this you can too. Find what works for you! -Tony

Anonymous said...

Woke up feeling like crap once again from drinking to much last night. Decided today is the day I stop. Reading everyones comments gives me hope i can do this. So this is my day 1....wish me luck.

Anonymous said...

Day 5.

Trying to see how long I can go without drinking. I'm 31 years old drinking since 16. I never thought I had a problem drinking. I usually hold my alcohol pretty well almost to the point people do not even know I'm drunk but myself. I was a heavy drinker drinking all those years I had a tolerance for it. My boyfriend gave me a 90 day challenge. I personally just want to see if I can make it to 4 weeks. Wish me luck!

Anonymous said...

Day 5 for me as well. I'm very moody and ULTRA tired! I'm drinking loads of diet soda, tea & water. I also am going to attemp stopping smoking this monday! Hope this gets better. My nights seem so boring without booze.

Anonymous said...

I have made it 7 days! I am extremely irritable, I can't sleep so I have been taking sleep meds... don't want to take them but it is the only way to get anything close to sleep. When I do finally fall asleep I have extremely vivid dreams of me going to or in liqour stores or drinking and I wake up either dissappointed in myself or tired and irritable.... sucks but I'm pushing on!

Anonymous said...

Day 5 of sobriety after 23 years of hard drinking. During that time, even though I got hammered most every night, I still was employed, went to college, never got a DUI. Because of my accomplishments, I rationalized my drinking problems. But my health has suddenly, severely started to deteriorate (not to mention my looks). I'm having trouble breathing, have rosacea and all kinds of health problems as a result of years of alcohol abuse. I know it's time to stop justifying my addiction. If I don't stay sober I think I'll be dead very soon. I know I can contribute so much more to society, that I can be many times more accomplished and successful without booze. But... change. It is scary. To go to a place you're wholly unfamiliar with. I've rarely been sober in my adult life. Don't know what sober sex will be like, don't know that I'll like my job, my life, without these toxins drifting through my bloodstream. All I know is that I have to stay clean or else.

Anonymous said...

Took me a while, but I read all of them. How interesting that this series of complaints and self loathing could be of such help:) The combined strength of the posters is inspiring. I have a story too. It's akin to those told here. The hangovers, the guilt, the lost opportunities, and the severed relationships; indecision resolved by sheer boredom. I always thought "one day at a time," was cliche, but it's true. That's how I take it - after just under seven weeks. For me, it seems that I have developed a great fear of the freedom sobriety offers. After all, it is a courageous endeavor in a variety of ways. But, I like to think that I am a different hero than I was with a beer in my hand. Hopefully, the new mythology of myself stands the test of time.

Anonymous said...

Day 60 and this is by far the most difficult day yet. The anxiety has me over thinking and the depression has me constantly crying. I know this is part of the healing process but it's really taking its toll on me. Everything that i used to love (except family) doesn't interest me like they used to,the praying helps but my mind is always thinking, and. Its scaring me a lil. I hope all of this is normal,if anyone has advice i'd love to hear it.

Anonymous said...

Hi everyone. I'm 27 & I have been a very heavy drinker since my early teenage years. I normally dated guys that were older I was drinking and using drugs at an early age. Around my early twentys I started using a lot more drugs and alcohol. Cocaine and vodka. Beer, liquor whatever, you name it I drank it. I got arrested for a dui. Then I got arrested for public intoxication diaorderly conduct and destroying a police car.. How I've held down a job for the last 7 years is beyond me. I thank God for that one. But this is when I decided that I hit rock bottom. I suffer from anxiety, depression and alcohol was making it worse and worse bit by bit.

I woulf have like a split personality i would snap at everyone around me, attack loved ones and strangers alike. I was a d aily drinker and then i decided i would binge drink only weekends and days off sonce i wasnt drinking daily...on my mind i justified it..

Anyway, I would do all kimds of crazy things and even didn't care if I put myself in danger I lost control. Alcohol became part of my bills. I would hide it, sneak around with it. Not eat to drink amd make sure I'd get drunk enough to feel "ok" and if I didn't I didn't feel "normal"..

Tjen the guilt, the black outs to the point wveryone else knew what I did except me. .

I've been sober for almost a month now as of july 14 it will be a month. I havemt had a drimk since June 14. I've never felt as physically ill as I do but I figure the more crappy I feel the better I'm doing. I want to continue sober. I wanna be a normal healthy woman.

Stay strong

Anonymous said...

Keep at it. Your body is slowly getting rid of the toxins and trying to get adjusted. This is why you feel so lousy but trust me it will pass and you will start to feel great. Your brain knows nothing else but alcohol and it looks for more. This will pass. Hang in there. You can do this.

Anonymous said...

Hello there, I am almost 35 and I have smoked drank and taken drugs for 20 years. I woke up in my own sick last Monday morning after drinking 3 bottles of wine and 2 valium, that was the wake up call I needed to change my life.
Drinking wine has escalated steadily over the past 4 years to the point of necking pint glasses purely to destroy myself as quickly as possible.
Self loathing has been with me constantly while drinking everyday. I have been shouting obscenities about myself to myself uncontrollably most days in a turrets like fashion.
I stopped smoking a week before using allen carrs only way to stop, but realised I only did this so I could carry on drinking.
Since Monday morning I have felt lucky not to have left my two boys without their father.
Over two weeks not smoking and 8 days sober and honestly say I don't miss any of it.
Already the self hating has began to ease, it has taken me twenty years to realise that I deserve better and owe it to myself to be strong and kick all of the substance abuse.
Really recommend reading allen cars book it definitely helped me. I found educating myself daily on all to do with recovery and health is reaffirming my new found convictions., this is how I ended up here.
Good luck every one on their personal recovery.
In twenty years time I hope to be telling a happier story, one of freedom and health and contentment.
One day at a time, peace

Anonymous said...

Thank you. This week on the 14th its a month!! & the only other really big disturbance I've been experiencing is in my vision. I have lost some of it. I see in a patchy dotted ant crawling way.

The optometrist performed a full vision eye exam and says its not my eyes. This started happening after I quit. He also recomended an mri. Anyone else seen something like this??? Any suggestions??

& tjanks for the motivation. Its good to read and hear others are rooting for you ad well as them understanding what this is like... stay strong :) ★★★

Sun said...

Todays is Day 29. I am 33 years old and had been drinking for the last 16 years. Vodka on the rocks was my drink of choice because it was healthier (less carb - haha, go figure. The 1st week really sucked. The 2nd week was very inconsistent - very uncomfortable at times, but elated at other times for no reason. The last several days have been more consistent.

I haven't been this happy and satisfied for a while. I am able to think quick on my feet now. I am able to carry a conversation with people without difficulty and feel genuinely interested in talking to them. I can tell the synapses are slowly firing again. I like to spend my days outside under the sun and be active. I now weight-lift, cycle, and run. I called one of my best friends with whom I use to booze with the other day and asked if he wanted to go out and throw around the football and frisbee at the park. I had a blast.

I went out with my friends last week to a restaurant that we usually hang out to eat and drink. Most folks were caught off guard and had trouble comprehending what they saw - I usually was the drink pusher. It was not difficult for me to refuse drinks that night, but it was difficult to sit and listen to the jokes that were made and the awkwardness that it made me felt. However, this week is better than last week. I now would be able to handle that situation like a champ. The elation I feel and the productivity that I have is very addictive. I don't feel uncomfortable in front of people anymore which is a very weird feeling.

Here is my advice to others based on what is working for me so far. There is no shortcut to recovery but there is a blueprint to make is easier. Drink multivitamins, B-complex vitamins, fish oil, exercise, and lots of water. Whatever vitamins you're body doesn't uses, you'll pee out. I raged during the 1st week and so I opted to confine myself away from others. Raging on others will only make you feel worse because then you'll feel bad about it and beat yourself up. There is nothing wrong with temporary isolation.

On the days you feel great, capitalize on it because those good days don't come frequently in the beginning. Go out and exercise. Don't worry about being an ultra marathon runner. Take a nice walk and work your way up. The important thing is to get your heart rate up so your body starts to produce natural endorphins. It takes 3 weeks to produce a habit for me, and so consistency is key.

On bad days, make a conscious effort to remind yourself that it is only temporary. If you think the pain you feel at the moment will last forever, then of course it will make sense for you to go grab a drink. However, if you have the consciousness and wherewithal to know that you're entering a low point, then be prudent and plan and react accordingly (i.e. avoid temptation).

Lastly, be honest with yourself. For you to stop drinking, you need to thoroughly understand why you want to stop and what you want to gain from it. A simple, "I want to stop because drinking is bad for me" or "because it's ruining my life" is not enough. Be analytical about your problem. This is important: The more you understand your own reasons for wanting to stop, the better position you'll be in to decide if you truly are serious about it. You can't trick yourself into wanting to stop as that wears down over time. It needs to be a burning desire based on sound fundamental logic and the cost vs. benefit of the choices you have.

Now enough babbling. Take care everyone and good luck. -Sun

Anonymous said...

I spent my 40th birthday in a detox facility for drinking and Xanax. I was a highly functioning, married mother of 3, but tired for all of the many reasons listed above. I was told if I just stopped abruptly it could be dangerous. So I went to detox. While in there, I found most everyone was a repeat visitor. I thought, "how could they let themselves go back?" Three weeks later I started drinking again and now 3 months later I'm "back." Not in detox or Xanax, just with drinking. I want today to be Day 1but I'm afraid of the health risks of stopping abruptly. Does anyone have advice on this?

Anonymous said...

Well, I answered my own question. After researching that I could quit safely with certain precautions, I decided to just go for it. I made it 48 hours. WTF? What it is that keeps me from doing what I SO f*&^ING WANT TO DO??? I will try again. I respect and envy all of you that have had the courage and resolve to do this. Its so easy to go the other way. You are all so strong.

Anonymous said...

Hope someone here can give me some information... I've been looking for something like this for the last five weeks now! All I could find was initial physical changes and not long term, and I'm still not sure what the long term benefits of stopping drinking are, or what kind of emotional changes I'm up against.

I had been drinking very heavily for the last 13 years, (18-31) there was also a 4/5 year stint of being a full time weed smoker, though that ended about a year ago but still smoking on and off, then there were the weekends of taking amphetamines. In the last year most of my drinking days were around the weekend, but before that my drinking was day to day. I got fed up of saying that 'I was never drinking again', went to a party, made a complete fool of myself, then managed to stop drinking. At first I felt really tired and then I felt really focused and had much more energy and I felt really happy, more happier than I'd ever felt. I'm now 5 weeks on and getting a little frustrated. I keep reminding myself that this is for the better, but I have to admit I'm getting lonely. All my friends drink, and though I chum them to the pub, I get anxious and leave early feeling frustrated. I tell myself that their relationship with alcohol is different to mine. They know when to stop and I don't, plus if I start drinking I'll be scanning everywhere for anything else that's on the go. I also remind myself of how much of a d**k I'd make of myself when wasted and that though I was telling myself I was having a great time, I actually wasn't since I couldn't remember half of it and that I had a week of depression and guilt to contend with afterwards. I'm fully convinced that alcohol has a very bad effect on me. But I am getting frustrated. Lately I've noticed that I have absolutely no sex drive, no interest, which is difficult for my partner. I do feel bad about that, but also our relationship was seriously strained because of my behaviour. I wouldn't see him at the weekend because I'd party for about 2 or 3 days, then during the week when I did see him my moods would be all over the place, I'm surprised he never ended it with me, but after being like that with him for two years and now being almost a different person I'm not too sure how to be around him. Today I was insensitive towards something he'd been having a hard time about, I didn't even realise what I said, he left in tears! So I've told him not to bother with me again, and I feel relieved! I'm worried that i'm going into a depression or becoming a hermit. I just don't want to be around people or talk to people and it's not because I feel anxious. I also don't want to see people. I just feel like being on my own. I try and fill my time with movies, the garden, cleaning and I'm trying to get into jogging, basically I'm trying to be productive. I feel as though I don't have a much of a clue as to who I am. I was something else for so so long that now I'm sober I have to get re-acquainted with myself. I guess what I'm asking is if anyone else has gone though the same and what kind of emotional roller-coaster am I on here? Will I taper off and become much more level? My whole giving up my drinking was to become a happier healthier person, not a miserable hermit.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you're going through the pains of reinventing yourself. The strength that takes and the independence you're gaining has to bring you to a better place at the other end. It has to!

Anonymous said...

I went through and experienced all the same emotions and physical issues and isolation when I stopped drinking years ago. I was not an easy road but I knew I had to stop or die. It took a bit of time but I was able to make peace with the loneliness and find myself. Everyone, all creatures suffer pain going through transformation. It is so worth it...the time is very short compared to the rest of your life. Get help if you need to. Go on an anti depressant medication, it makes your life so much better. No need to suffer if you don't have to. It all worked for me. My prayers for a good peaceful recovery are with you and all.

Anonymous said...

Inspiring mate, totally.

Janey said...

Day 5 & feeling positive especially knowing i'm not alone,this blog has given me some comfort, Thank you everyone <3 xxx

Anonymous said...

I'm 34, female. i quit smoking 5 weeks ago and went through hell with mood swings and insomnia - today is my first day to recovery from alcohol dependency - used to drink between 6-12 beers per day plus about 5 double whiskey's. Used to be very drinking fit, but since i quit smoking my body does not go well with alcohol anymore and the hangovers are 10x worse. I LIterally feel sick the next day and then i drank only half of what i used to drink because after quitting smoking i'm get wasted on much less alochol.

Im just hoping that the irritation or insomnia is not gonna get worse now that i quit drinking too - my poor boyfriend has been so supportive during my moodswings. But i have to do this now that it's not fun to drink anymore. Besides i always wanted to be able to say NO to alcohol.

Marc said...

I've been a heavy drinker - 20+ per week - for probably 6 or 7 years. Quitting for good was so hard, I felt like I'd never be able to do it until one day I got a really bad cold and felt so awful I couldn't drink for at least 5 days. After stopping, I was tired all the time, had little appetite, and was so irritable and slept poorly. After a few weeks, all the symptoms started to subside significantly. All of a sudden I was sleeping better than I could ever remember, my energy level and motivation rebounded to where I was feeling great, and my focus returned. It's been so long since I can remember feeling this good all the time. Plus, seeing people in bars getting drunk, I just realize how idiotic I use to look, how meaningless drinking is, how much of a waste of time and money it is. It was so hard at first, but this is the best decision I've made in a long, long time.

«Oldest ‹Older   1 – 200 of 269   Newer› Newest»