I'm convinced that many of us have learned that happiness is not internal, but really how we show our internal state to others, such that, if we can manifest objective interactions that profess happy indicators, we can convince ourselves that we are indeed internally sated. Unfortunately, it is highly depressing for me to witness such interactions and know, through intuition or just plain experience at witnessing these patterned behaviors (with the utmost hope that they do not exist), that they exist and are manifestly evident.
I know it is a struggle to find one's place, one's self, or one's center, and to operate from a consistent base so as to maintain integrity. I also know that most of us are even indirectly desperate not to be alone.
Which brings me to another nodule: happiness need not be experienced at break neck speed. Perhaps it is due to age and insecurity, or maybe it is simple a trajectory we follow as we age, but young adults seem to act out happiness in an almost aggressive manner while older adults seem to know that happiness is more associated with something more substantial, less manic. I'm obviously not fully sure on this point, myself.
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