Monday, January 3, 2011

Learning Something New -- like Sobriety

We adults don't like to admit we're not aware of something, or incapable of performing some task, but that doesn't mean we still can't learn how to do it.  My thinking has suffered from just this kind of defect: I'm basically "who I am" already, and that is a set list of capacities that doesn't change much.   I'm not trying to say that we're not more skilled or less skilled at certain things.  To some extent, however, the attitude that we can't change keeps us from changing, or learning.  It also keeps us from thinking that learning takes time and serious effort.  If I can't "do" something right away, then I won't be able to do it, for instance.  That's just not true.  It may take a few years to learn a language, for instance.  There's progress along the way though--and sure, I can feel bad about my language acquisition skills if I think about all of the ways I don't understand it.  I can also feel good about what I've done.  Seems obvious when I write it out like this that over emphasizing the good or the bad makes it less likely that I'll simply keep on trying to learn.  And isn't AA all about learning to become sober?  That is, the ability to keep on trying without coming to a conclusion about the result of those efforts right away?  I.e. learning to live like a kid again.

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