If you've planned to give up drinking for the new year: welcome.
If you've given up drinking before: welcome.
If you have been divorced, dirty, morally challenged, and regret deeply: welcome.
When you figure out that you have to make a change and you're on the third sick day of benders: welcome.
When you give up alcohol and gain ten pounds from the counterbalance of sweets; if
you're grumpy and assholish and nasty when you can't get your fix; and
you're smart and devilish and sarcastic and a little crazy and selfish and you have decided you know everything you can like the foolish teenagers you calibrate away from seeing clearly: welcome.
And when you decide, after your five weeks of post new year slump that being sober is a downer;
And when your friends decided that your sober self is a bit different, shall we say, from the "real" you;
And when the light bulb cannot be fished out with a half cut slice of potato;
And when the fledgling excitement is stale:
Welcome.
This is sobriety.